From One Point of View
by Biscuit15
Summary: After inviting himself along on Squalo's business trip to Japan, Bel meets Yamamoto and the others. Confused as to why Yamamoto makes him feel things he had never thought existed, he knows he has to keep the younger male to himself and work out just why he feels this way only around him. AU, B80 80B yaoi.
1. Chapter 1

Looking down at the brat standing before him, Squalo raised his eyebrow; he hadn't been expecting for anyone to show up at his home and, quite frankly, he didn't have the time to be dealing with shitheads inviting themselves over like this; he needed to get to the airport as soon as possible before his plane left without him.

"The fuck are you doing here, Bel?" The long-haired man's eyebrow went up further as the other giggled, already knowing the answer; there was no other reason the blond boy would be standing here with a bulging suitcase and an expectant look on his face. "Where's Lussuria?"

"He's talking to Xanxus, shishi~" The teenager stepped closer, letting go of his suitcase so that he could wrap his arms around the man in a seductive manner; sometimes the business man had to be buttered up a little first before the smaller male could get his own way with him. "He said I could come~"

"But _I_ didn't say you could, shithead!" Sighing as the younger's grin only widened, Squalo threaded gloved fingers through his soft locks; there was no point in trying to deny the boy as Belphegor would get what he wanted in the end anyway. "Have you at least got a ticket?"

"Ushishi~" Pulling his passport and ticket out of the front pocket of his suitcase, the smaller male waved them in front of the man's face in a taunting manner, as if to say the adult had no choice but to bring him. "Put my stuff in the car, peasant~ I have to say bye to Lussu or he'll cry~"

Snorting at the fact that his uninvited travel partner was indeed right about that last part, Squalo leant down to pick up the suitcase that would undoubtedly be packed full of unnecessary items; Belphegor was spoiled like that.

"Alright, brat, but get your ass moving; we need to be there ASAP."

"Yeah, ye -"

"Don't leave just yet!"

Both Squalo and the boy turned around at a feminine squeal, not surprised to see Belphegor's guardian rushing towards them. The silver-haired man smirked as he watched Belphegor being engulfed in a hug the youngest hated, amused by the blond's futile attempts at freeing himself.

"Sweetie, don't leave without saying goodbye!" The flamboyant man known as Lussuria nuzzled his cheek against his charge's, squeezing the skinny body in his arms. "You know I miss you every time you go with Squa~"

The boy sucked in a sharp, anxious breath at the restraining action, his fingers twitching as he restrained the impulse to slip a knife from his pocket and stab his guardian. "..."

Finally pulling away from the student, Lussuria smiled brightly as he caressed the younger's pale cheek with his thumb. "Make sure you behave for Squa, hon~ Don't forget your medication and be good~ Squalo has my permission to smack your bottom if you're being naughty for him~"

Belphegor shot his guardian a seething glare, embarrassed that Lussuria still resorted to putting him over his knee if he hadn't behaved; he was sixteen! He didn't need that kind of punishment!

"I didn't agree to that!" The scrawny boy argued. "I hate being smacked! He can't lay a finger on me because I say so!"

"Bel, dear, you're just a boy; if we need to smack you, we're going to."

"Voi!" Grabbing the ill-tempered little brat's hand before the youngest turned this into World War Three, Squalo tugged him away from Lussuria. He leant down to get the suitcase from the ground as he said, "There's no time for this shit! Let's go!"

"Bye, sweetie!" Completely used to his charge's unbalanced temperament, Lussuria was unfazed. "Have fun!"

The boy grumbled something as he crossed his arms against his chest, earning another smirk from Squalo.

"How did you even know I was leaving today?" The man asked, opening the door to the garage.

Forgetting his bad mood, a large smile crossed Belphegor's face. "That's a secret, Squ-Squ~"

Squalo snorted. "Were you snooping through my company computer again? Or did Lussuria tell you?"

"Shishi~ Both~"

"Figures." Opening the back door of the car, Squalo tossed the suitcase on top of his own. "Get in, brat."

The younger grinned as he slipped into the passenger seat, grabbing at the CD case hidden beneath him. He flicked through it for a few seconds before he pulled out a disc, handing it to his guardian with joy. "Let's listen to this one, Squ!"

Squalo was silent as he took the disc; he didn't know why he was always so soft with the boy, letting the younger get his own way all the time, but it probably had something to do with the blond being a manipulative little genius who knew just what expression to wear to worm his way into peoples' hearts and get them to do what he wanted.

Squalo knew that was a bad trait for someone as unstable as Belphegor, but he never voiced his thoughts out loud; part of him loved the spoilt brat, even if the younger did drive him crazy.

_**~~XX~~**_

"What kind of business are you going to Japan for?"

Squalo looked away from the airplane window at Belphegor's voice. He pulled a bud from his ear, having been listening to music as he watched the land move beneath them. "Xanxus has a merger opportunity. He sent me there to negotiate."

"You're Xanxus' bitch, shishi~" Belphegor's obscured eyes sparkled with amusement as he watched the man clench his hand in anger, the older male knowing not to cause a scene lest they get kicked off. "What company is it?"

Taking a deep breath, Squalo fought to remain calm. "Does it really matter, brat...?" he hissed.

"Well, yes, because I want to know." Slipping on his most charming smile, the student cocked his head to the side to make himself look cute; he knew that Squalo had a weakness for adorable things, and that was just what he naturally was - or so he liked to believe; he didn't have reason to think otherwise, after all. "Is it a big deal?"

"Yes." Tensing as the other leant against him, Squalo cleared his throat in uneasiness; he had never been a fan of touching unless it was during sex. Looking down, Squalo frowned at his charge. "Do you fucking mind, brat? You know I hate people touching me so casually."

"Yeah, but I'm comfortable like this." Pressing himself as much as possible against the stronger male, Belphegor purred contentedly. "You're really comfy, Squ-Squ; I might just get hard if I lay here for too long~"

Squalo's face paled as he resisted the urge to vomit, severely uncomfortable with this; he wanted the other to go back to his own chair and leave him alone, but Belphegor had to insist on making everyone around him uneasy; he wasn't happy unless he was disturbing others.

But then, in one split second, Squalo's discomfort grew to concern; feeling the younger tense against him, he became aware of a baby crying somewhere in the back of the plane.

Knowing how Belphegor didn't like loud things, much less crying babies in enclosed spaces, Squalo shrugged his earphones off before placing the buds in his charge's ears instead.

Belphegor blinked up at the man at the unexpected gesture before he warily took the iPhone that was being passed to him. A tiny, barely visible yet sincere smile crossed his face as he silently unlocked the phone, intending on setting up a playlist for himself; as rough around the edges as Squalo was, he had a heart - it was just buried deep beneath layers in an attempt to keep himself from getting hurt.


	2. Chapter 2

When Belphegor woke up the next afternoon, it was to Squalo shaking him. He let his eyes open as he took notice of the soft mattress beneath him and the heavy blanket wrapped tightly around him that was nice and toasty; he must have slept like the dead for once and been carried by his temporary guardian to a hotel once the plane had landed.

"Squa...?" Yawning, the blond sat up as he slipped his hand beneath his long bangs, rubbing at his eyes. "Squa, where are we...?"

"Japan, brat. Get up; it's lunchtime."

Shaking his head, Belphegor laid back down, pulling the blankets over his head. "Still tired, Squ-Squ..."

"Get your ass out of bed and get dressed!" Ripping the blankets from the younger, Squalo growled. "We're going to have sushi for lunch, so get up or I'll leave you here and eat it all by myself!"

"You're a jerk!" Belphegor argued, hating whenever he had to get out of bed before he was ready; he loved to sleep as much as he could, especially when he was so comfortable. "Leave me here and bring sushi back for me!"

"I'm not your fucking slave! Get up! You need to take your meds anyway!"

"I don't want them." Rolling onto his side, Belphegor closed his eyes.

"Voi, if I have to take meds, you can have yours, too, you ungrateful little shit; I don't like them any more than you do." Again, the teenager protested. "For fuck's sake… If I have to hold you down and force them into your mouth, I will!"

"That sounds like rape; I'll shout that if you try it!"

"You do this _every _time I'm in charge of you!" Moving to the luggage the man had lazily dropped in the corner of the room the night previous, Squalo rummaged through the blond's belongings until he resurfaced with the zip bag of medication Lussuria would have no doubt planted in there without Belphegor's knowledge; the unstable male would surely have tried to destroy them if he knew they were accompanying him on his travels.

Snatching a bottle of water he had left on the bedside table for these occasions, Squalo climbed onto the bed and straddled the younger. Belphegor squealed as he tried to push the other away from him, turning his head to the side as the offending bottle was brought ever closer to his mouth. Starting to buck in an attempt to free himself, he whimpered as a large hand pushed down on his chest to keep him in place.

"Room keep – o-oh…"

Turning to look at the door that had opened unexpectedly, Squalo paled as he realised what the scene looked like; the horrified expression on the woman's face said it all.

"It's not what it looks like!" Waving his hands in the air, Squalo tried desperately to explain himself, but before he could so much as open his mouth again, Belphegor piped up.

"Rape!" Sending a sneer to the man only Squalo could see, Belphegor shouted out again; he would very much love to see how this played out. "Rape! I need an adult!"

Taking the smaller male's open mouth as his only chance, Squalo grabbed pale cheeks and squeezed them tightly to keep the little jaw open long enough for him to tip a handful of tablets and water into. The boy choked and spluttered, but with the long-haired male rubbing his throat, it was enough for him to swallow with minimal problems.

The maid, who was quick to work out what she had walked into, apologised profusely as she bowed her way out of the room, closing the door gingerly behind her. Squalo glared down at his charge, not impressed in the least.

"What did you plan to do had she believed you, Belphegor?" the man scolded. "I'll kick your ass if you get me into trouble for shit I haven't even done!"

"You'll have to catch me first, old man." Shoving the stronger male off of him, the blond scowled in annoyance as he moved to his suitcase in order to get dressed for his day. "You said there'll be sushi. I want sushi, Squa. Let's go get it."

"Fuck, you just wanted to be difficult, you little shit." Moving to sit on the edge of his bed, Squalo watched the younger pull his shirt off, looking away from the scar-covered body that had greeted him.

Instead, Squalo grabbed his own box of medication from the bedside table, pulling the blister packet out and popping two tablets into the palm of his hand. He swallowed them in silence before he stood up, heading into the bathroom.

"I'm having a shower and then we'll go." The business man was quieter than usual, having found long ago that seeing Belphegor's body always had that effect on him; it depressed him, making him wonder just how much the younger had suffered in his life. "Watch TV or something until I'm out."

Belphegor shrugged before he slid a green-and-black striped shirt over his scrawny body, calloused hands undoing the belt on his pants next. "Just be quick; I'm really hungry."

"You're always hungry."

Smiling pleasantly at the man, Belphegor cocked his head to the side. "I know."

Shaking his head, Squalo muttered something about unpredictable little brats before he disappeared into the bathroom, leaving Belphegor by himself.

Once he was alone, the blond's smile dropped from his face as he pulled his belt out from the loops. He dropped it onto the ground before he kicked his jeans off, replacing them slowly with tight black pants.

Belphegor knew how to fool everyone around him with his cheerful smile and happy attitude, but sometimes he wished he could fool himself as well; it would certainly make his life easier if he could forget how bad he usually felt.

_**~~XX~~**_

"Ooh, I've been here before, Squa~" Looking up at the sign that read 'Takesushi', Belphegor let a lazy grin cross his face. "Lussu has taken me here when we were on holidays~"

"Good, so then I won't have to explain shit to you." Sliding gloved fingers through his hair, Squalo scowled. "Be on your best behaviour, kid; I know the guy who owns this place, and he feeds me for free so don't fuck it up."

"Oh?" Curious by nature, the teenager wanted to hear more; who knew what kind of blackmail material he could get if Squalo said more on the subject. "How do you know him?"

"Swordplay. He's good." Glancing down at the teenager beside him, Squalo shrugged. "We versed each other, and he respects me as a fellow swordsman. Fuck my reputation up for me and I will kill you."

The younger hummed as they entered the restaurant, immediately taking notice of a group of teens tucked away towards the back. He had never understood what the appeal of crowding around was, finding that he was just fine as long as someone he trusted was nearby – he couldn't imagine himself being part of a friendship circle because he greatly valued his privacy and time alone so that he could think about things he didn't want anyone else to know about.

The student tilted his head at them, but before he could approach, his guardian had grabbed his shirt and tugged him closer to the man's side, unwilling to let distance grow between them; Squalo knew what Belphegor was like, and he didn't want to be the one who was supposed to be looking after him when the younger got himself thrown straight back into a psychiatric hospital.

"I just want to play with them..." Pouting up at Squalo, Belphegor put on his best beaten puppy look. "Lussu always said I needed to make friends!"

"Your idea of 'playing' is fucking warped and I won't tolerate it. Stay with me and leave them alone." Dragging his charge over to the counter, Squalo forced Belphegor to sit down before he took his own seat. He watched the blond from the corner of his eye as he placed his order with the man named Tsuyoshi, not surprised that the scrawny boy seemed to be watching the other group in fascination; he usually gave people disinterested glances before he went about his own business, often lost inside his own head to really care about the strangers he would probably never see again.

The owner of the restaurant held a big smile on his face as he gave his customers what had been requested, also taking notice of the blond's behaviour. Leaning across the counter, he said to Squalo, "Does he want to meet my son and his friends?"

"Ah, that's not a good –"

"- Oi, Takeshi!" Squalo's heart dropped when the other called out to the group, not wanting to get them involved with Belphegor; despite what Lussuria wanted to believe, the teenager was better off being kept away from other people; he wasn't stable enough to be trusted not to hurt anyone. "Come over here a minute!"

Belphegor visibly tensed at the group's approach, and it worried Squalo when the student next started to quiver in excitement; the best thing to do was to get him away from everyone else and back to their hotel room.

"We should –" Trying to excuse them both so that they could leave, Squalo cut himself off as he shot his hand out, taking the small silver knife his charge had just pulled from his pocket. Snatching it from shaking hands, the man slipped it into his own pocket, hoping no one had seen what it was.

Clearing his throat, Squalo shrugged nonchalantly. "Belphegor owes me money so I took it before we both forgot." Hoping they would buy the excuse, he relaxed slightly when father and son laughed cheerfully.

"That must have been a lot of money if they didn't want to forget it!" The tall, spiky dark-haired boy that was no doubt Tsuyoshi's son had a smile that Squalo found blinding; how people could be so happy was beyond him, and it often made him uncomfortable – knowing Lussuria for twenty years did that to people. "Good thing none of us don't owe anyone money, hey, Tsuna?"

The brunet that stood by the owner's son held a timid expression on his face as he nodded. He mumbled something before he turned to the silver-haired male next to him, moving to stand closer to him, giving Belphegor the impression that this teenager was shy, and most likely was a push-over – his favourite kind of person.

"Can I play~?" Putting on his most innocent expression, Belphegor cocked his head to the side.

The brunet looked more alert at his question, as if he saw through the taller male's act. He started to shake his head, only for his dark-haired friend to accept. "Sure! What's your name?"

"Bel~" Smirking at Squalo as if to say 'I win', the scrawny boy kicked his legs back and forth through the air.

"Yamamoto, I'm not sure that's such a good idea..." The brunet tugged at his friend's blue jacket, his hazel eyes shining with worry.

"You're right; it's not." Trying to get his charge back to himself, Squalo clenched his hands in frustration when Tsuyoshi dismissed his words.

"Why not show him your room, Takeshi?" The owner sent a grin to Belphegor, encouraging the foreigner to get up and follow his son.

Growling when the younger stuck his tongue out at him, Squalo grabbed the back of the striped shirt, halting Belphegor's movements; he knew he would never stop the boy from leaving, and if he kept trying to, it would only rouse suspicions about the teenager. "Before you go, brat, is that... _all_ the money you owe me?"

"Ushishi~" Understanding the hidden question, Belphegor let his tongue hang out the side of his mouth as he nodded, obscured eyes sparkling with mischief.. "Yup~"

"Show me; I need it all." Unconvinced, Squalo refused to let the other go until he was confident Belphegor was knife-free; it would only lead to bloodshed if he weren't.

Laughing to himself, the boy turned his pockets inside out and removed his white laced boots, effectively revealing that there was no more weaponry hidden on his person. "Can I go now?"

"...Don't make me have to send you back to Italy, shithead..." Turning back to his meal, Squalo felt sick at the realisation that he was leaving Belphegor alone with three other teenagers, all of whom looked to be younger than the sixteen-year-old. "…You've got ten minutes…"

"Shishi~" Poking his tongue out at the other again, Belphegor looked around curiously as he followed the others; he had only been in three homes in his entire life; his parents', and later on Lussuria's and Squalo's; he had never been to anyone else's before, and it was strange to see the huge contrast between what he lived in and what someone else did.

Addressing the tallest of the group, Belphegor lazily said, "Your name is Takeshi. Yamamoto Takeshi."

"That's right." Jerking his thumb at his friends, Yamamoto introduced the others. "This is Tsuna and Gokudera."

Uninterested with the others, Belphegor ignored them and instead stopped to scowl at the small fluffy brown puppy that had just ambled from one of the rooms. He wanted to kick it, to hear the satisfying crunch as its skull broke, to drag his knives through its body and drink in the musical cries of agony, but he didn't get the chance; Yamamoto had scooped it up into his arms, hugging it tightly with a huge smile on his face.

"And this is Jiro."

Scrunching his nose up, Belphegor frowned. "I hate animals."

The other two males - Tsuna and Gokudera, they had been introduced as - shared an uneasy look.

"Ah, Yamamoto..." Putting small fingers on his friend's arm, Tsuna fidgeted as he smiled shyly. "...Umm... Can I hold Jiro for a while, please...?"

Unaware of the fact that his friend didn't want Belphegor anywhere near the puppy, Yamamoto was only too happy to oblige. "Of course, Tsuna!"

Belphegor watched the exchange before he looked to Gokudera, feeling green eyes glare at him. "What?"

"The Tenth and I see right through you, so you'd better not try anything," the other hissed, a look of mistrust in his eyes. "I'll kick your ass if you do."

"Oh?" Tilting his head to the side, the boy's amused smile genuinely reached his eyes. "What do you mean?"

"You're up to something." While Yamamoto spoke happily to Tsuna, completely unaware of the smaller two's conflict, the brunet inched closer to Gokudera, paying more attention to the argument; he had a feeling that something wasn't right with Belphegor, and he didn't want to risk anything happening to his friend.

"Nope~" Deciding that he was done dealing with the other, Belphegor wandered away from the group, still exploring. He was surprised that Yamamoto had caught up with him so quickly, the taller male telling him what room he had just stepped into.

"This is my room." Stepping to the side, Yamamoto let his friends come in next. He watched, as happy as ever, when the blond climbed onto his bed and lay down, crossing his arms behind his head. "That's my bed, but you can lay on it if you want."

"Good, because I was going to anyway." Obscured eyes caught sight of all the baseball trophies and equipment scattered around the room, deducing from the posters that lined most of the walls that Yamamoto loved baseball.

When Yamamoto spoke again, Belphegor wasn't really listening; he was too busy focusing on the stronger male, trying to work out why he was getting the same tingly feelings in his stomach as he did whenever he watched gory horror movies; never before had someone so… so _unharmed _turned him on, used to only ever becoming aroused if there was blood involved.

"Bel?"

Belphegor jumped at his name, having become so lost in his thoughts, he had forgotten where he was. He looked down at his lap, not surprised to find his pants starting to tent; though he wasn't aroused by the same things other males his age were, he was still a teenager and prone to erections at the most random of times – and imagining Yamamoto covered in the sticky red fluid didn't help matters much.

"What?" Fixing his oversized shirt so that it hid his erection, Belphegor looked up at Yamamoto.

"I asked where you came from." The Japanese teenager's eyes sparkled, a smile that Belphegor could only describe as dumb and innocent on his face. "Are you here on holidays?"

Grunting, Belphegor shrugged. "I don't remember what country I was born in; I blocked out a lot of things before I was adopted by Lussu. I live in Italy with him now, and I wanted to come up here with Luss' friend while he was on business." Letting his body start to quiver as his arousal started taking over his senses, the blond licked his lips as he struggled to contain himself; if he was going to kill anyone, it would be _after _he found out why Yamamoto seemed to have this sort of power over him.

"When do you go back to Italy?" Yamamoto wasn't fazed by the smaller male at all; he was finding the other quite interesting – it was just a shame that Tsuna and Gokudera didn't seem to share his enthusiasm for getting to know the guest better.

"Dunno. Depends on if Squa gets the deal or not, I guess. I don't care how long I'm up here for; I don't have to go to school and I can stay in bed all day."

"Isn't there something you would rather do than be in bed?"

Belphegor laughed at the thoughts that went through his mind, knowing he couldn't tell the others what he was imagining; though Lussuria made him give up his knifes and sit in the living room where he could be supervised if Belphegor decided to tell him about his daydreams, the hospital he had been admitted to when he was younger had been stuck in the mindset of the mid-nineteen-hundreds and had punished him in ways that had left both physical and mental scars on him – he trusted Squalo and Lussuria to never reprimand him like that, but he wouldn't take chances with anyone else, not when his knife had been confiscated off of him and he was outnumbered by two potentially stronger males.

Gokudera and Tsuna knew that whatever was going through the blond's mind was not pleasant, but Yamamoto seemed oblivious to the blatant insanity that was displayed right in front of him; he simply laughed along with Belphegor, his eyes crinkling as he smiled.

"But then I guess it is rather nice to lie in bed at times," Yamamoto agreed. "I like to do it when it's raining; it's so peaceful."

"Rain is – go away, Squalo! I'm not leaving yet!" Annoyed that his guardian had chosen now to show back up, Belphegor pulled one of the pillows out from behind him and threw it at the man.

"Damnit, brat!" Dodging the pillow, Squalo stomped forward and wrapped his hand around the student's skinny forearm. He tugged the younger from the bed none-too-gently, forcing him to his feet. "We're leaving! Look, I've got your fucking sushi in a bag so you can't complain I didn't let you eat! Let's go!"

"But I don't want to!" Trying to pull away from his guardian, Belphegor growled. "Leave me alone or I'll scream rape again!"

Not in the mood to deal with such bratty behaviour, Squalo scooped Belphegor up into his arms and turned around, intending on leaving as fast as he could. He shivered when he felt an unmistakable hardness pressing against him, and he instinctively looked back to see whom the unstable male had harmed, surprised to find everyone still intact; this was _very _odd.

Yamamoto waved goodbye as Squalo left the room, laughing as the teenager shouted angrily in Italian. "Bye, Bel! Come back anytime!"

When they were sure the two foreigners were gone, Tsuna put the puppy down onto the ground. "Umm, Yamamoto…"

"Yes, Tsuna?" Leaning down to pick his pet up, Yamamoto's smile brightened.

"I think it would be better if you stay away from him…" Looking to Gokudera to see the other nod in agreement, it made the brunet frown to see his dark-haired friend don a disappointed expression.

"How come?" It was clear that Yamamoto was saddened by the news, most likely having not seen anything wrong with his guest. "He was really fun to talk to."

"…" Scratching at his cheek, brown eyes darted to the side as Tsuna tried to explain his reasoning. "…I just think… that he might be a little sick… That's all."

"Sick?" Cocking his head to the side, the taller teenager didn't understand. "He looked so healthy, though; surely we wouldn't catch anything, Tsuna."

"I don't mean that kind of sick; I mean… in the head kind of sick…" When silence answered him, Tsuna dropped the subject, knowing he would have to find a way to make the other understand; Yamamoto was the kind of person who refused to see the bad in everyone around him; he had never bothered to learn that there were some things that could make it harder for him to ignore, mental illness being one of them.

"He was really nice, wasn't he?" Stroking his fingers through Jiro's fur, Yamamoto smiled. "I hope he liked us, too."

Gokudera restrained himself from saying anything about this, knowing it would only upset Tsuna if he were to voice his thoughts out loud. Instead, he just shrugged and said, "I'm going out for a smoke…"

With that said, Tsuna and Yamamoto were each left to their own thoughts.

_**~~XX~~**_

"That wasn't like you at _all_." Glaring down at the boy he had dumped unceremoniously on the bed, Squalo put his hands on his hips. "The only normality of it all was the fact that you were about to stab one of them had I not stopped you! What the fuck is going through your head?!"

Turning his nose up at the man, Belphegor shrugged. "I thought you would be happy I didn't kill anyone. Lussu would have been over the moon."

"I never said I wasn't, you shit!" Throwing the bag of sushi at Belphegor, Squalo backed up. "I just want to know why I wasn't scraping anyone up from the ground."

Shrugging again, the younger opened lid to his carton of food. "I didn't feel like it."

"And _that?_" Pointing to the boy's lap where the erection was still visible, Squalo felt his face pale; greatly uncomfortable with this. "Why is… _that _there?"

"I don't know. I got tingly like when I've cut something heaps, or when I watch my gore fests, and it happened."

"…" Shaking his head, the long-haired man muttered, "You're one fucked up kid, brat."

"You love me anyway." Making sure to put on his most charming smile, Belphegor cocked his head. "What school do they go to?"

"How the fuck would I know? Does it look like I live here?" Moving to sit down at the small table across from them, Squalo spread out the documents he had been sorting through earlier that morning. "I'm working, so leave me the fuck alone!"

"But what if I'm dying?"

"Then die quietly!" Mumbling away to himself, Squalo tried to focus on his work, wondering why he bothered tending to the kid's every whim; Belphegor was a spoiled brat who needed to learn he couldn't always get his own way - but for some reason, the man had a feeling that would be a lesson the boy would never come to learn.


	3. Chapter 3

It wasn't unusual for Squalo to worry about leaving Belphegor alone in the hotel room; while they were in Japan together the blond was his sole responsibility, and he didn't want anything to happen, knowing what the results would be.

Sighing, Squalo resigned himself to the fact that there wasn't anything he could do except _hope _the teenager would keep himself out of trouble for a few hours; if he could bring his charge with him to discuss business he would, but he had already been told beforehand that Belphegor wasn't to come.

Glaring at the student perched on the bed, the long-haired man growled, "You'd better still be sitting there by the time I come back, Bel. If I find you've so much as _touched _the doorhandle, I will boot your ass."

Waving a dismissive hand in the air, Belphegor cocked his head to the side. "Squa knows he can trust me~ I'm _very _trustworthy; I don't lie~"

Knowing that the other was indeed too truthful for comfort, Squalo shuddered at the thought of some of the things that spilled from the boy's mouth; it was no secret that the younger had problems, and that was putting it kindly. "Just stay in the fucking room, Bel..."

"I'll think about it~" Turning back to the TV he had been watching, Belphegor lay down, pulling the blankets around him like a cocoon of sorts. "I probably won't listen to you, though~ At least I'm honest about it, right~?"

"Then give me those fucking knives!" Squalo snapped, holding his hand out expectantly. "You think I'm going to leave you alone with those?! I don't even know how you got them to Japan in the first place!"

"Ah, but if Squa gets caught carrying weapons, not getting the business deal will be the least of his problems~" Pulling one of his blades from his pocket, the blond raised it to his lips. His tongue left its moist cavern, licking around the serrated edge. He giggled as his groin stirred from the danger, his obscured eyes fixed on Squalo's in order to gauge his every reaction. "Unlike me~ I have nothing to lose if I am caught with them~"

Stomping towards his charge, Squalo snatched the knife away. He put it in his pocket before he growled, his eyes narrowing. "I'd take everything that comes with being caught with a knife over losing you, and you _know _it. Now give me the rest of them!"

"Shishi~" Throwing himself backwards onto the bed, Belphegor offered a deceivingly gentle smile. "Squa needs to calm down; he shouldn't care what happens to me~ I'll kill everyone, and once I'm done I'll slit my own throat and laugh~ I'll even take _you _and _Lussu _out if you dare get in my way."

Bristling in anger, Squalo shouted something incomprehensible before he raised his hand in a threatening manner. Belphegor didn't flinch; he instead just stared up at the other with a challenging expression, just _daring _his guardian to smack him.

"Lay a hand on me and you are _dead_, Squalo," Belphegor hissed. "I will _kill _you."

"Yeah, I fucking know!" Squalo wasn't intimidated by this threat; he and Lussuria heard it every time the blond didn't get his own way. Bringing his hand down, he slapped his charge hard across the face. "You're not fucking stupid, so don't act like you are! You think you have those kinds of rights?! To take your own life in such a stupid fucking manner?! Where the hell is your goddamn pride, kid?! Pride means winning at all costs! That _includes _staying alive! There are plenty of other ways to go out, but for fuck's sake, suicide is _not _becoming of you!"

"I'll kill myself if I want to, Squalo! It's _you _who doesn't have the right to make _me _live if I don't want to anymore!" Swinging his fist at the man, Belphegor connected with the skin just above Squalo's eye. He growled as he kicked out, fixated on the blood that was slowly dribbling down his guardian's face, but physical strength had never been his forte; he had always fought best with his knives.

"You little shit!" Squalo roared, slamming the blond down onto his back. He grabbed thin wrists in one hand, pinning them above the boy's head. Amidst the younger's struggles, he accidentally elbowed Belphegor in the face, leaving what would become a large bruise. Using his body to pin the teenager to the bed, it was all Squalo could do to stop the other's thrashing. "Stay still, you little shit! It's about damn time someone knocked some fucking sense into you! Don't you _ever _fucking _hit _me _again!_"

Belphegor growled as a calloused palm connected again and again with his face, baring his teeth as he tried to turn his head to bite at the offending hand. "I hate you! I_ hate_ you!"

Squalo went to open his mouth to respond, only to stop when he felt a rising pressure against his stomach. He glanced down, already knowing what it was, about ready to snap for good; he was under enough stress as it was with his job and Belphegor wasn't making it any easier.

Instead, the man sneered before he said, "You're such a fucking creep, getting hard over being abused. You'd be fucking impossible to rape because you'd like the struggle."

"Fuck you!" Panting, Belphegor rolled onto his side, leaving his back to Squalo. "I hate you; I'll kill you first before Lussu. I'll be sure to give you a slow and painful death."

"Yeah, fuck you, too, Belphegor." Grabbing the corner of the bed sheet, the long-haired man wiped at his face, cleaning the blood from his skin. "I still mean it; you'd want to be here when I get back or your ass is grass."

"..." Glaring hatefully at the wall he was staring at, the blond ignored the soft hum of the TV in the background; he just continued to lay on his side, his head resting on his wrists as thoughts ran rampart through his head; he could kill himself now just to spite the man, or else he could ambush the other tonight when he was sleeping; they both seemed like great ideas, but what one would give him the most joy?

Sighing, Belphegor decided he wasn't in the mood for such intense plotting and instead closed his eyes, letting himself drift off into sleep; he'd have a quick nap to recuperate and then he'd go into town and track down the teenagers he had met the day prior.

It was lucky he always brought more than one knife with him wherever he went.

_**~~XX~~**_

Finding the group of teenagers was easier than Belphegor had anticipated; it was Saturday, and school had let out earlier than usual; he had come across his prey walking through town, most likely on their way home.

Licking his lips, Belphegor couldn't help but picture the dark-haired male covered in blood, unable to imagine a more arousing situation than one where he could freely drag his blades through the other's skin and have him _moan _for more.

Approaching the younger three, the blond made sure to let his oversized shirt hang past his belt, not caring if anyone realised he was getting hard, but knowing that it would make things difficult if these three were to realise that one of them was the cause of it.

"-and Kyoko said that she'd – hiee!"

Belphegor smirked at the brunet he had startled, glad that jumping in front of them had been worth the effort; he loved seeing what kind of emotions he could draw from others, and nothing made him happier than knowing that someone was suffering. "Hello~"

"Yo!" Takeshi raised his hand in greeting, a large grin crossing his face. "I didn't expect to see you here, Bel."

"Hmm~" Regarding Tsuna and Gokudera, Belphegor's hungry eyes drank in the paper the silver-haired male was holding. He smirked as he skimmed across the name written up top, saying, "Hayato slips much more smoothly off my tongue; wouldn't you agree_?"_

"Listen, you creepy bastard," Hayato snarled, stepping forward in a threatening manner, "if you –"

"Now, now, Gokudera; no need to fight." Unable to stay mad at his friend, Takeshi instead turned back to the foreigner. He opened his mouth to say something before a dark look crossed his face, piquing Belphegor's interest; it was an expression unfitting of the taller male, and it made the boy want to split the other's head open and unravel this entire mystery piece-by-piece. "You have bruises and hand prints on your face..."

Belphegor withheld a crazed laugh, knowing full-well that his face was swollen and marred from Squalo, but he knew exactly how he could play with this. Forcing himself to drop his happy smile, he instead donned a mock-frightened look, tensing his body to make it seem more genuine. He spoke in a voice softer than usual, saturating his tone with as much hurt as he could muster.

"Squalo hits me when Lussu isn't around..." Looking to the ground, Belphegor knew no one would see the sneer that had crossed his face now. "He hits me for no reason other than that he's bored, or because he's in a bad mood... He punches and kicks my body, too... He knows no one will notice because I always wear baggy shirts…"

While Hayato and Tsuna shared a look, unsure of whether or not they believed these words, Takeshi fell for it, hook, line and sinker. "Bel... I'm sorry..."

"I'm so scared of him..." Wondering if he could fake a tear or two, Belphegor swallowed his pride; it would be worth it if he could get what he wanted in the end. "I want to tell Lussu what he does to me, but I'm too scared; what if Squalo hurts me again...?"

"Can you go back to Italy?" Takeshi stepped closer, putting his hand on a thin shoulder. "You need to get away from him."

Shaking his head, Belphegor bit back a laugh of amusement; was he really that great an actor, or was Takeshi just stupid? "I can't... I came up with him because Lussu had family things happening, so even if I went back there, I'd be stranded for a few weeks... I'm not even supposed to be out of the hotel room; he tried to tie me up to the bed before he left, but I got out... If he knows I left the room, he'll..."

"Bel, don't go back there," the tallest male said gently, his eyes shining with compassion. "Why don't you come back to my place for a while instead? You'll be safe with me; I wouldn't hurt you."

"I'm so scared..." Hugging himself, Belphegor forced his body to start shaking for dramatic effect. "I want to go home... I want Lussu..."

Pushing ever-so-slightly on the smaller boy, Takeshi started walking. "Come on, Bel; come back to my house so we can talk about this."

Nodding, Belphegor put up the best fearful act he could manage. He wasn't sure he had fooled Tsuna or Hayato, but Takeshi definitely believed him.

"I don't get it; Squalo seemed like such a nice person..."

Belphegor couldn't contain his snicker at these words, and though he knew Takeshi hadn't heard it, the same couldn't be said for the smaller two trailing behind them.

_**~~XX~~**_

After arriving back at Takesushi, Belphegor hesitated to step into the bedroom. He purposely flinched away when his host reached out to him, uttering a small, "I'm afraid, Takeshi..."

"Why are you afraid?" Tsuna and Hayato watched from inside the room, not liking to see their friend being duped so easily, but what could they do? Should they say something to Takeshi now or wait until Belphegor was gone? What was the right thing to _do? _"What did he do to you, Bel?"

Looking to the side, Belphegor was glad his bangs hid his eyes from view, because the amusement that was shining in them would have long-since given away the facade. Forcing out a timid, "He raped me this morning...", he took a few steps back. "I don't... I don't want it to happen again... It hurt so much... I cried and begged for him to stop, but he only made it hurt more..."

"We won't hurt you," the Japanese teenager promised; while he didn't entirely understand rape, he did know that it was something bad, and that it left scars on victims. "We're not like that; not even Gokudera."

Seeing that Takeshi had looked back to his friends now, Belphegor sent a sneer to the silver-haired male, _wanting _him to see it, before he said, "I don't like Hayato; he's scaring me..."

"Gokudera, be nice to Bel."

"Fuck off!" The other snapped, reaching into his pocket to pull a lighter and a pack of cigarettes out. He lit one up in seconds, green eyes glaring hatefully at the blond. "I don't trust this creep and you shouldn't either, Yamamoto! He's up to something!"

A genuine frown crossed Belphegor's face as his chest started tightening. He dropped his hand, reaching up to grip at his striped shirt as he hunched over, breathing becoming harder for him.

"Bel?" Takeshi moved over to the other, leaning down. He put his hands on a fragile back, worried by the wheezing that was filling the air. He watched as a blue pump was pulled out of the boy's pocket, gathering that it was an asthma inhaler, and he watched without judgement as Belphegor took a few puffs of it. "Gokudera, go outside if you're going to smoke; he has asthma."

Hayato mumbled to himself as he did as instructed, making sure to kick the blond as he passed them. Belphegor growled before he straightened up, a few ragged coughs escaping his lungs, but he didn't say anything; he just made his way over to the bed and curled up on it as he had the day before.

"I'm sorry about Gokudera," Takeshi said softly. "He doesn't like many people."

Grunting, Belphegor rolled onto his side. "I don't care..."

"If you want to stay here with me, you can do that," the dark-haired male promised. "You'll be safe from Squalo here with me."

"He'll come looking for me, and if he finds out I'm here, he'll hurt you, too..." Belphegor had had plenty of experience acting, and it was something he never tired of; while he fabricated truths about other people in order to see what kind of reactions he could elicit from Lussuria, he didn't usually have ill intentions behind them – but today, he was planning on getting back at Squalo in a manner the other would never see coming; nothing would hurt the man more than having his pride tainted by false allegations, and if Lussuria ever caught wind of them, he would believe his charge over Squalo without doubt.

"What can I do to help?" Takeshi sighed, wishing he knew what to do; he had never been in this situation before, but he certainly wanted to be able to do something to get Belphegor out of that kind of life; while he would never have guessed it based on seeing their interactions together yesterday, he supposed that some people were good at hiding their true feelings.

That might explain why Tsuna and Hayato seemed so uncertain on the blond, after all.

_**~~XX~~**_

When Belphegor stepped into the hotel room later that night, he wasn't surprised by the shout that greeted him.

"I fucking told you not to leave the goddamn room!" Standing up from the couch he had been relaxing on, Squalo pointed his finger accusingly at the teenager. "The fuck were you doing?!"

"Shishi~" Smirking, Belphegor twisted his hands as he stalked closer to the other, his eyes taking in every inch of the man. "I found those three from yesterday, and I stayed with them for a while~ After that, I went around town and I found someone trying to take a shortcut through an alley~"

Squalo's face paled at the possibilities. "You fucking didn't..."

"Ushishi~" Nodding, Belphegor licked his fingers as he reminisced. "There was lots of blood and I made sure she was dying slow so that the sex was best."

"You fucking didn't!" Squalo roared, angered to know that no matter what he and Lussuria did with Belphegor, the teenager's mental state was _far _from sane. "What have you been told about that?!"

"I only have sex with them when they're dying slow so that their suffering is prolonged, Squa~ Don't be mad~"

"I _am _fucking mad! I'm furious!"

"Shishi~ Then why don't you hit me again, Squa? Smack my face and give me another bruise, 'kay~?"

It was then Squalo realised that Belphegor was up to something; the other _never _allowed himself to be smacked, much less _asked _for it. "No fucking way, brat!"

"No? Alright, then~" Running as fast as he could at the wall, Belphegor made no move to slow down until he had slammed into it with a sickening thud. He took no time to gather his bearings, instead spinning around and slamming his face hard against the edge of the bedside table. He laughed loudly as Squalo swore and moved to him, dodging the man's arms so that he could instead bring the side of his face down on the bed post, intending on giving himself a black eye.

"Fucking _stop!_" Squalo was horrified by what he was witnessing, no idea what the other was thinking but knowing it was nothing good. He finally got Belphegor into his arms, restraining the thrashing male, feeling sick to his very core as the other laughed in pure insanity. "Bel! Calm down! Belphegor!"

"It hurts so good!" The blond moaned as he tried to get free, intending on doing more damage to himself because of the state of euphoria he had put himself in. "I love it!"

Squalo grit his teeth as he dragged the struggling male over to their suitcases, rummaging around inside the teenager's suitcase for something he knew Lussuria would _definitely _have packed without the youngest's knowledge. Wincing at the high-pitched squeal of pleasure right next to his ear, Squalo resurfaced his hand with a syringe and a small bottle of sedatives. He held the boy in one arm as he filled the syringe up and, just half a minute later, he had injected it into the unstable male's bloodstream.

Belphegor gradually fell limp, soft laughter still escaping his lips, but he didn't resist anymore; not as he was undressed and changed into pyjamas, nor carried over to his bed and lay down on the soft mattress. He simply laughed until his eyelids grew too heavy to hold open anymore and oblivion started to wash over him.

Squalo sat on the mattress next to the boy, threading his gloved fingers through soft blond locks for a while longer until he picked the sleeping male up and hugged him tight. Dropping his face against short hair, the man sighed. "You're fucking lucky I love you or else I'd have told Lussuria to put you straight back into another fucking lunatic hospital..."

Laying Belphegor back down, Squalo pulled the blankets over him before he brushed long bangs from the other's eyes. He stood up and stretched, making his way into the bathroom so that he could have a shower; looking after the boy took so much out of him, and he just wanted to get some sleep.


	4. Chapter 4

Belphegor awoke the next morning laughing from the throbbing sensations all over his face. He rolled around on his bed a few times before he squealed in pleasure, lifting his hands to rub the swollen areas.

"The fuck are you doing?"

Belphegor giggled as he looked over at Squalo, finding the man sitting at the coffee table with a cup of coffee in his hands. Dark eyes fixed on the boy, a disapproving look crossing his face. "Squa~ It feels so good~ I'm getting hard again~!"

Squalo shuddered as he looked away, not knowing what to say; it always made him uncomfortable whenever the younger would freely talk about his private life. "…Well… Go take care of that shit somewhere else…"

Rolling onto his side, Belphegor licked his lips as his obscured eyes wandered over his guardian's body. "I'll give you a handjob if you'll fuck me hard. You aren't allowed to use lube or prepare me, though; you have to hurt me if you want to get me off."

Horrified by these words, Squalo tensed, not even sure why he was bothering to reply. "If you want anything from me, a handjob isn't going to cut it, shithead; at least offer to blow me or some shit – but that's _beside _the point! I'm not fucking you, brat!"

Putting on his most seductive look, Belphegor pushed himself off the bed. He prowled over to the man, looking much like a lion stalking its prey, before he knelt down in front of Squalo and pushed the man's knees apart. Tilting his head back, the boy looked up at the other from beneath his long bangs. "I don't usually suck others off, but it might hurt my jaw if I make an exception for now."

Squalo was frozen as the younger's fingers ghosted over his crotch, not wanting this to happen, but too shocked to be able to stop the boy; there was nothing he wouldn't put past Belphegor, but having the student bring his face close enough to lick at him through the confines of his jeans…

The man was ashamed to see his own arousal growing beneath the younger's ministrations.

"Belphegor…" Pushing half-heartedly at the teenager, Squalo choked on a moan, knowing he needed to stop this now before it escalated into something he would regret. "Belphegor, stop…"

Looking up at his guardian, Belphegor licked his lips. "If I suck you off, you'll fuck me the way I want it. You should feel honoured to have my mouth so close to your dick; I wouldn't do this for anyone else."

Raising his hand to his mouth, Squalo's eyes became half-lidded as lust crossed them and heat rose to his cheeks. He shuddered as he felt the other unzipping his pants in order to free him, biting back all sound as a hand far smaller than what he was used to wrapped around him. He couldn't help but compare it to his lover's calloused, scarred hands, and it was then he realised the situation he was in; if he let this go any further, it wouldn't just be paedophilia; he would be cheating on his boyfriend.

Mustering all the strength he had in him, Squalo grabbed the boy's shoulders and threw him backwards, kicking him in the stomach for good measure. He stood up, hastily tucking himself back into his pants as he roared, "Don't you ever fucking do that shit to me again!"

Belphegor just continued to lick his lips as he eyed off the older male, finding the other's dominance over him to be a huge turn-on. "I won't tell Xanxus, Squa~ I promise~ It'll just stay between us and not even Lussu will ever find out~ Okay~?"

"Fuck off!"

"Shishi~ Squa doesn't have to be afraid; I won't tell anyone if you decide to do inappropriate things to me~ You can do whatever you want to me; you can touch me anywhere you want~"

"You're sixteen! I'm not a fucking pedo!"

"Your cock says otherwise~" Tilting his head to the side, Belphegor continued on. "You're not really my type, though; you wouldn't scream for me like I can make everyone else scream, and you wouldn't want to try and make _me _scream. You're boring."

Squalo looked away in embarrassment, his hand over his crotch as he tried to work out what to do with his excitement. He didn't want to touch it when it had been brought on by something so… so _unwanted, _but… at the same time, it might be the only sexual gratification he would get while he was away from Xanxus; he wasn't the type to sleep with others no matter how lonely he was, not while he had a boyfriend waiting for him back in Italy.

"…Fuck off…" Squalo wasn't used to speaking so quietly, but he was greatly uncomfortable with this whole situation; why did Belphegor have to be so fucking twisted? "I don't give a shit what you do; leave me be before I kick your ass for what you just tried to do to me – I have a fucking boyfriend, you promiscuous shit."

"Shishishi~" Walking over to his suitcase, the blond went about getting dressed for the day, planning on going to find Takeshi and seeing what other mischief he could get into today.

_**~~XX~~**_

It had been easy enough finding Takeshi at his home, the younger's father only too happy to let him into the back of the resturaunt without supervision, the man returning once more to preparing sushi for the day. Walking through the corridor, Belphegor whistled a tune only he knew before he stopped and glared at the puppy that had come out of one of the side rooms.

"What are _you_ looking at?" Slipping his hand into his pocket, Belphegor withdrew a knife, wondering if he could get away with taking the dog outside and torturing it to death without anyone realising. His groin twitched at the thought but, before he could act on anything, the animal turned around and ran, as if sensing something was wrong with the blond. "Stupid mutt... I'll get you one day…"

Continuing on with his journey, Belphegor soon found himself standing outside of Takeshi's bedroom. The door was open, and it was only too easy for the boy to stand there and watch as Takeshi sat at his desk doing homework. He debated keeping his presence hidden, but the sudden anxiety that overwhelmed him at not understanding _why _he would want to watch made him move into the room and announce his arrival; he was so used to being in control of himself at all times, always knowing exactly what he was feeling, he felt out of control, alien in his own skin.

"Oh?"

Belphegor raised his hand to his mouth, unable to believe a soft hiccup of distress had left his mouth; he had always been so good at forcing his true emotions deep down inside of him, allowing nothing but a small frown to hint at his feelings - why was it that he was suddenly flooded with anxiety and confusion?

"Bel, what are you doing here?"

Dropping his gaze to the ground, Belphegor genuinely flinched when the younger approached him. He stepped back, putting distance between the two as Takeshi reached out, shaking his head as he tensed his body; this was no acting, no getting back at anyone; it was the real deal, and Belphegor hated it.

"What happened?" As if sensing that something was wrong with the blond, Takeshi stayed still, a soft look crossing his face. "Did Squalo do something to you again?"

Breathing heavily, Belphegor fumbled with his pocket as he tried to pull his asthma pump out. He took a few breaths before he dropped the pump to the ground, feeling as if it hadn't helped in the least. Hugging himself tight, he turned around, ready to flee; he didn't like what he was feeling, and his usual method of venting only made him feel more conflicted; he wanted to stab Takeshi over and over again to get rid of his stress, but at the same time, it felt wrong to cause so much damage to the taller male - never before had stabbing someone felt wrong to him, so why now, with someone he hardly knew?

"Bel?" Looking down at his puppy that had just come to his side, Takeshi frowned; Jiro had never growled at anyone before, but here the animal was, his teeth bared as he growled at the boy. Trying to ignore this, the Japanese male stepped forward again, putting his hand on his friend's shoulder. "Bel, are you -?"

Belphegor threw himself backwards with a loud yelp, his body shaking as his mind was assaulted by things he didn't want to think about, memories he wished he never had but were always there in the back of his mind, waiting until he was vulnerable before they plagued his mind like locusts that always took away pieces of the little sanity he had left.

Takeshi was worried, having never seen anyone like this before. He bit his lip before he grabbed Belphegor's striped sweater, pulling the smaller male into his bedroom. The blond snarled and shouted incomprehensible things, struggling in the other's grip, but the younger male's gut feeling told him that Belphegor was lost in his head and probably didn't even notice what he was doing.

Forcing the skinnier male into a sitting position on his bed, Takeshi leant forward, wishing he knew what to do; where were Tsuna and Hayato when he needed them?

As hard as the dark-haired student had tried, it seemed all he could do was watch as his guest passed out on his bed, a large frown on the blond's face. Reaching out, Takeshi caressed a pale cheek as a sad smile crossed his face. "You've been through a lot, haven't you, Bel? I trust my gut, and that's what it's telling me right now."

Moving back to his desk, Takeshi continued on with his homework as he patiently waited for Belphegor to come to. His puppy was on his lap, seemingly calm again, and it left the teenager to wonder; why had Jiro growled at Belphegor in the first place? Why was it that Tsuna and Hayato weren't the only ones to dislike his new friend?

Shaking his head, Takeshi knew not to think on it too much; he would just have to leave the boy to rest for now and hope he would come to in a clearer state of mind when he woke up.

_**~~XX~~ **_

When Belphegor's eyes fluttered open an hour later, he was surprised to find the younger male was sitting across the room with his back turned; it was rare people would leave themselves open like this, knowing that he would gladly take the opportunity to stab them in the back - literally.

Unwilling to move, Belphegor muttered, "Doesn't it scare you leaving your back to me...? Everyone else won't come near me, let alone trust me like this..."

"Why?" Frowning at these words, Takeshi couldn't fathom how that must feel; he was a popular student, always with girls clinging to him; it must be horrible to be treated like that.

Looking away, Belphegor muttered, "Because I made everyone scared of me..."

"What do you mean?" Takeshi wasn't frightened by these words; instead, he wanted to help however he could; Belphegor had clearly been hurt in the past, even _he _could see that.

Belphegor shrugged. "People say… I'm not right in the head. _Everyone _says that; even Lussu… I don't think there's anything wrong with me, so I _hate _it when people act like I'm crazy… I just… get angry sometimes…" Unsure of why he was even telling the younger these things, the blond sighed. "I hate school because everyone treats me like a freak… I figured that the more scared of me they are, the less they'll bother me… It's true for most of them…"

"You're not a freak, Bel," Takeshi promised in his most gentle voice. "I like you; I think you're a really interesting person and you're so nice; it's just a shame you have to go through that at school as well as what Squalo does to you."

Flinching as a large hand reached out to touch his face, Belphegor lifted his arms in front of him, purely out of instinct. He sucked in a shallow breath as his body started shaking, hating that he could feel his moods, his inhibitions dropping with each passing day; he didn't want to be so vulnerable to someone else, but he truly was feeling bad; he could feel his depressive mood sneaking up on him, rearing its ugly head as it swallowed him whole.

"Don't..." Belphegor growled, glad that the other had pulled his hand away, but this only raised a question; why hadn't the blond stabbed Takeshi yet? He had raised his knives to Squalo and even Lussuria countless times, so why was this one so different? "I hate people touching me..."

The dark-haired male took no offense to these words as he asked in a gentle manner, "Is it because of what Squalo does?"

Knowing that the younger was on the right track, even if it wasn't the long-haired man's fault, Belphegor shrugged again. "Something like that. You wouldn't understand even if I told you."

"I could try; I'm a good listener." Sending the smaller male his most charming smile, Takeshi understood when the other hesitated to reply.

"..." Biting at his lip, Belphegor fought back the tsunami of helplessness that always crashed over him when he got to thinking about his past. Growling to himself, he soon shook his head as he muttered, "It's not important. They said that... That all that shit made me the way I am. I don't want to talk about it."

Wishing he knew how to help, Takeshi hummed thoughtfully before he smiled again. "Talking is nice; it makes me feel better when I have someone to talk to."

Belphegor muttered something beneath his breath before he pulled the blankets over his scrawny body, truly not in the mood to move from where he was. "Go back to what you were doing; I will watch you from here."

Takeshi nodded, knowing the blond probably just wanted to be left alone. He went back to his desk, putting his puppy on the hardwood next to his work. He worked in silence on his science homework, never minding the fact that Belphegor's gaze burned into his back for what felt like an eternity.

"Hey, Bel?" Turning around to face his guest after an hour, Takeshi stretched his arms into the air. "Want to have lunch here?"

When Belphegor didn't move, the Japanese male was quick to realise that the other was fast asleep. Smiling, Takeshi stood up and left the room, knowing he'd have to put a plate away in the fridge for when his friend woke up; he liked the idea of Belphegor eating with him, even if Tsuna and Hayato had told him repeatedly to stay away.

How would the two react if they heard that Belphegor just hadn't had a nice life? Would they understand and accept the blond for who he was? Or would it only make their feelings worse?

Knowing he was in a bit of a pickle, Takeshi made a mental note to talk to his dad later and see what the man had to say; the sushi chef always did know just what to say, after all.

_**~~XX~~ **_

When Belphegor woke up a little later, it was to the younger male sitting on the floor playing a videogame. He pushed himself into a sitting position, trying to recognise what the other was playing, only to come to the conclusion that he had never encountered this one before.

"Do you play videogames all the time?" Belphegor sat up a little straighter, his voice slurred from sleep.

Takeshi turned to look over his shoulder. "Sort of; I spend most of my time with my friends or playing baseball, though."

"But you like videogames anyway." It wasn't a question.

"Yeah, of course I do; if I had time, I'd play them a lot more."

Belphegor was pleased by these words, videogames being his favourite hobby. He rubbed at his eyes, saying, "I like you more now; no one else I know plays them."

Takeshi laughed cheerfully, leaning back on his elbows. "Want to play with me? We can make it two-player."

Letting a genuine smile slip onto his face, Belphegor nodded in glee as he accepted the invitation; he had never had anyone to play with before, Lussuria usually too busy to indulge in his kid's wishes and Squalo always claiming it was a waste of his time.

"I need to play with the controls for a minute so I can learn them." Snatching the spare controller sitting on top of the console, Belphegor plugged it in and moved to sit next to Takeshi. It had been a long time since he had sincerely felt joy around someone else that _didn't _involve pain and bloodshed, but for whatever reason, he was feeling very calm and relaxed, not feeling any need to so much as _think _about his knives. "I'll only need to see them once to remember."

"Wow, you must be really smart." In awe of his friend's intelligence, Takeshi's eyes opened a little wider.

"I am~" Feeling pride swell up in his chest, Belphegor continued on. "I am a genius~"

"That's so cool! Gokudera's really smart, too; he always gets one-hundred percent on all his tests at school."

Feeling no need to reply to these words as he was confident he was _much _smarter than Hayato, Belphegor instead said, "You're first player; pick multiplayer."

Forgetting that he had just sat there staring at the blond, Takeshi jumped as he did as told, laughing. "Sorry!"

Belphegor shrugged, not bothered by the inconvenience; it would be worth it if he could finally have someone to play with.

_**~~XX~~**_

Letting a yawn escape his lips, Belphegor dropped his controller to the ground as he lay back, looking up at the roof. He wriggled his toes a little before he turned to look at Takeshi, having been enjoying things so much, he had lost track of time.

"Squalo's going to throw a fit if I'm not back at the hotel soon." Lifting his hand to run through his hair, Belphegor sighed. "Do I have to go back?"

"You can stay here," Takeshi promised, not wanting to send his friend back to someone so abusive. "My dad won't mind, and I can make a bed up for you on the floor."

"Nah, I've got to go back." Unwilling to admit that Squalo would have the police out looking for him if he didn't come back soon, the blond instead played it cool. "It'll only make him hurt me again if I stay here."

Takeshi nodded in reluctant acceptance, only for a frown to cross his face as he caught sight of a scarred wrist, the other's striped sweater having lifted. "What happened to your arm?"

"Hmm?" Raising his hand to look at the injuries, Belphegor felt numb at the way he had been asked so calmly, as if the wounds were scratches from a fall. "That depends. Which scar are you asking about?"

Pointing to one that circled all the way around the other's thin wrist, Takeshi said, "What about this one?"

"That's from rope; it was around my wrists for weeks. I kept struggling and it only dug into my skin further; got really infected and everything. Could have lost this hand from it all."

Takeshi felt his heart breaking, wishing he knew the story behind that – but would it be a pleasant one? It certainly didn't sound like it would be.

Instead, the Japanese student pointed out another scar, one that started from the bottom of the blond's palm and went all the way to his elbow. "…That one…?"

Staring at the jagged scar, Belphegor's eyes grew cloudy as depression overwhelmed him. He hesitated for a few minutes before he mumbled, "…I… I did that one…"

Unable to understand how someone could mar themselves like this, Takeshi's eyes widened. "Why?"

"Because I tried to kill myself." Shrugging, Belphegor felt the depression leaving as soon as it had started, replaced instead by his initial numbness. "I did that after I got out of the crazy hospital. I had been with Lussu for a few months before I was forced into a straightjacket and a padded room by the court; I guess when he took me back out of it, I kind of forgot who he was and assumed he'd have been like everyone else."

None of this made sense to Takeshi, but he could tell that the other was picky on what he'd talk about; did he really have the right to delve into someone's life when he hadn't known them for long at all?

"Alright." Nodding to himself, Takeshi said, "I've made up my mind."

Belphegor flinched at these words before he looked to his lap. "…You think I'm a freak or something, don't you…? You're going to tell me to get the fuck out and never come back."

Shaking his head, the taller student donned a soft expression. "Not at all; I want to be your friend and someone you can lean on."

Not knowing at all how to reply to these words, Belphegor remained silent; did he really want someone to lean on? He was so used to being alone, he had learned he could rely on no one but himself, could trust no one not to hurt him. He knew that if he made himself vulnerable, it could lead to _anything; _he refused to trust others with his life, knowing that humans were the epitome of monsters.

But… Sometimes it _did _get lonely for him, and he _was _curious as to what it would be like to have someone by his side in this cruel life.

"Doesn't it bother you, what I've just said?" Knowing that the information he had just disclosed on impulse was only a _quarter _of the reason why people treated him the way they did, Belphegor couldn't help but feel defensive; was he being led on? Set up for hurt? He wasn't used to this kind of reaction, and it _terrified _him being unable to estimate where this situation was heading.

"No. Well, only a little. I mean; you tried to kill yourself, so you're clearly in pain." Offering a sad smile, Takeshi whispered, "That's the only thing that bothers me because I hate my friends hurting."

Not wanting to tell the other he had tried to end his life countless times, Belphegor let his eyes close. He tensed as he felt strong arms wrap around him, but for once, he didn't resist; it was… nice, being held against such a warm chest. Lussuria hugged him all the time, but this was different to the man's hugs; unlike Lussuria's hugs, this one wasn't too tight, too constricting and threatening; it was… perfect.

Dropping his head against Takeshi's chest, Belphegor slowly allowed himself to relax, not even sure of _why; _just that in all of his sixteen years, he had never known such a soothing embrace.

For once in his life, Belphegor didn't mind that someone was touching him.

_**~~XX~~**_

"Hey, dad?" Not long after Belphegor had left, Takeshi went to talk to his dad. He found the man in the back of the restaurant, helping his assistant with the dishes.

"What's up, Takeshi?" The older male turned to smile at his son, pausing what he was doing to focus on the teenager.

"Could I talk to you in private, please?"

Tsuyoshi nodded, putting down the plate he was cleaning. "Of course. Did something happen?"

Turning around to walk back out into the personal living room, Takeshi sat by the kotatsu as he waited for his father to join him. "It's just… my friend is going through a really hard time and I want to help him, but I don't know how. I haven't known him for very long, so I don't know what the best thing to do is."

"Hmm. Did you try asking him how you can help?" Tsuyoshi was patient as he waited for an answer, smiling sadly when his son shook his head. "Well, try that the next time you see him. What kind of hard time is he having? Not doing well at school? Or did he break up with his girlfriend?"

"Nothing like that." Not sure if he should spill Belphegor's secrets or not, Takeshi hesitated before he said, "He comes from Italy, but he's up here with someone else at the moment, and… Well… He gets… He gets hit a lot, and… raped… by his guardian… I don't know if I should have told you or not, but I didn't know what to do…"

Tsuyoshi's eyes widened as he gasped, sitting up straighter. "Takeshi, tell your friend he can stay here with us; we need to go to the police about this."

"Dad, wait!" Frowning, Takeshi wanted to go along with his father's wishes, but also knowing he couldn't betray Belphegor's trust by meddling with his life like this; what was he supposed to do in this situation? Hurt his friend, or let him suffer? "I… Let me talk to Bel first; maybe I can persuade him to go to the police himself; it doesn't feel right intruding like this."

"Takeshi, if he's being abused like this, it has to be stopped right away. Where is your friend? What's his name? I'll go and call the police right now."

"Dad! I… I'm confused… About what the right thing to do is…" Frowning at his lap, Takeshi had never felt so useless before. "I want you to do this, but… I don't want to hurt my friend…"

Seeing how upset his son was over this, Tsuyoshi backed down reluctantly. He sighed before he said, "I'll let you talk to him first, Takeshi. Who's doing this to him?"

Meeting his father's gaze, Takeshi didn't hesitate to answer. "It's the blond who came here with Squalo. Squalo's been abusing him."

_**~~XX~~**_

When Belphegor trudged back into his hotel room that night, Squalo looked up from the bowl of ramen he had been idly swirling with his chopsticks. He sighed as he looked at his charge, dark bags beneath his eyes showing just how hard he was overworking himself. "About time you came back, shithead; any longer and I'd have had the cops out looking for your ass."

Belphegor shrugged, not a word escaping his lips as he approached the bed Squalo was sitting on. He climbed up onto the soft mattress, curling in next to his guardian as his thin digits gripped tight the grey hoody the long-haired male was wearing.

"Voi…" Knowing this wasn't usual behaviour for the younger, Squalo became worried. He threaded his gloved fingers through soft golden locks, muttering, "You didn't get up to anything, did you…? There's no blood on you, so… the fuck were you out doing?"

The boy shrugged again, his mouth set in a firm frown. "…"

"What's wrong?" Putting the bowl on the bedside table, Squalo laid down next to his charge. He tensed as the smaller body pressed in close against him, greatly uncomfortable with this entire situation. "What happened, Bel? Why are you upset?"

"I'm allowed to have a friend, aren't I…?" Belphegor whispered, raising his free hand to twirl silver hair around his fingers.

"What do you mean? Of _course _you can have friends – as long as you don't fucking try and slice them up or some shit."

"How come I've never had one before? Am I really… so detestable…? Is it my fault, Squa…? Is it because… Am I really… Am I really… _sick…?_"

Not knowing how to handle the situation, Squalo tugged the blankets out from beneath them. He pulled them over their bodies, saying, "Any knives you have on you go anywhere _but _in my bed, brat… You're sick, yes, but it was _never _your fault, Bel. You're not detestable – a fucking pain in the ass, yes – but not detestable."

"..." Closing his eyes, Belphegor sighed. "…I'm sorry…"

"For what?"

Rolling his shoulders for the third time in as many minutes, Belphegor didn't reply to this; he knew he shouldn't have said such lies about his guardian, but sometimes he really lost sight of himself and who were the only two people who had ever stayed with him. He got mad easily, and he did things he would later realise he shouldn't have – but regretting those things? Never. He didn't feel remorse, making apologies he didn't truly mean because he knew it was normal, something he _wasn't_. He had long-since grown good at mimicking behaviour, able to deceive people in any manner he wished; he knew what right and wrong was but he chose to disregard that and instead do what he wanted.

Would he be disappointed if something happened to Squalo because he had gone and ran his mouth off? Yes. Would he feel guilty over it and regret what he had done? No. Squalo was the only other person apart from Lussuria who looked after him, but Belphegor didn't consider himself as emotionally attached to either of them; if anything, he was _detached _from the world and everyone in it.

Both Squalo and Lussuria could go die for all he cared.


	5. Chapter 5

Within the few days that had passed, Belphegor found himself going back to Takeshi more and more, sometimes with more lies about Squalo in order to experience what he was coming to learn was called _comfort_, and other times just because he wanted someone to play videogames with. Tsuna and Hayato still didn't like him any better, but they seemed to sense that if they said anything about him to Takeshi, Belphegor would make them regret it; the blond was always sure to give off enough of a vibe that he wasn't afraid to kill someone in order to make them back off, and it was working wonders so far.

"Oh, Bel!"

Belphegor looked up from his phone, finding the trio standing around him. He had been sitting under a large tree on the sprawling lawn of Namimori Middle, playing a game on his phone as he waited for school to let out.

Slipping his device back into his pocket, Belphegor cocked his head to the side as he smiled softly, unaware of the fact that whenever he was around the younger male, his facial expressions didn't look so twisted, so bloodthirsty – instead, they were bordering on innocent, looking much more childlike and suited for his age; so _gentle_.

"I was starting to get tired of waiting." Standing up, the blond brushed himself off. He stayed still when Takeshi hugged him, a jittery feeling in his stomach taking over his senses as he felt heat rise to his cheeks; he didn't understand what he was feeling, but he had seen it enough in the hormonal girls at his school whenever they were around their crushes; did that mean he had a crush on Takeshi, or was he simply content with being around the other?

Pulling away from Takeshi, Belphegor fidgeted with his black hoody, tracing over the smiley face Lussuria had printed on it. He tensed when he felt Tsuna brush against him, and he couldn't help but snarl at the smallest male. "Don't. Touch. Me."

"Now, now." Takeshi smiled as brightly as ever as he raised his hands in the air, calming the situation. "No need to fight; it was an accident, Bel."

Tsuna frowned at the blond, his hand on Hayato's chest to stop the silver-haired teenager from getting involved; it frightened him how Belphegor's moods could change from one extreme to the other, and without warning – one of the reasons he didn't like Takeshi hanging around the Italian teenager; he might get hurt. "…"

"You should give a damn apology, you freak!" Hayato snapped, trying to push past his best friend to get closer to the other teenager. "He didn't mean it!"

Sticking his nose up in the air, Belphegor grunted. "I'm not apologising; he shouldn't have touched me."

"He wouldn't want to touch a creep like you anyway! You'd probably rape him if you had the chance!"

"Gokudera-kun!" Tsuna pushed the older male back, horrified by these words; he had seen the way Belphegor's anger had only increased at the first accusation, and now the other looked ready to slaughter them all where they stood. "Gokudera-kun, don't talk like that!"

His hands clenched painfully by his side, Belphegor bit through his lip as he trembled from rage; he knew he was a freak, that he wasn't above rape and had done it countless times, but to have it thrown in his face like this, no different to what he went through at school…

Screaming something incomprehensible at the two teenagers, Belphegor raised his fist and drove it into Hayato's face, not content with the sickening thud that resounded. He reached into his pocket, his long fingers curling around one of his knives, but before he could resurface with it, he froze as Takeshi got in between them; why did his stomach churn at the thought of stabbing the taller male?

"Stop!" Takeshi didn't _look _angry, more upset that his friends were fighting like this, but one could never be too sure because the tallest of the group _sounded _angry. "Guys, stop! Gokudera, you have no right to talk to Bel like that!"

"He just hit –"

"I _know _he hit you – I _saw _it – and he shouldn't have done that, either, but what you said to him was horrible!"

"Does it _look_ like I give a damn about what I said?!" Pointing to the blond who was standing still, Hayato's green eyes flared with hatred. "There's something wrong with him and you're too stupid to see this! He's up to something and you're going to get hurt if you keep hanging around him!"

"You're just like everyone else…" Belphegor muttered, a dark look crossing his obscured eyes. He gripped tightly his knife, not even noticing as the blade sliced his palm open; his chest was hurting, not because of his asthma, but because of a feeling he had never experienced before; he felt… _hurt_, as if he were _upset _over the way he had been treated; while it was true he had always hated the way others spoke to him, never before had he been shocked enough by what was said to want to cry. "People think they know me when they _don't_. They think they can read me and think that all I'll do is hurt people. I don't know… Maybe they're right about the last thing, but _no one _knows me; _no one _can read me. I _don't _want to hurt Takeshi, but talk about me like that again and I will _kill _you."

"See?!" Hayato was quick to punch back, but unlike himself, the blond didn't even try and avoid, taking the attack as it was. "He's fucking crazy! He should be medicated and locked away in a straitjacket!"

Before anyone could say a word, a loud smash filled the air as Belphegor threw his phone down onto the ground, breaking the case and shattering the screen. The blond stormed off from the group, not looking back as Takeshi called out to him.

"You shouldn't have spoken to him like that, Gokudera-kun," Tsuna said softly, honestly feeling a little bad for the blond; he knew what it was like to be bullied, and his best friend could really be cruel sometimes; he was surprised it had taken Hayato this long to snap.

Takeshi felt his heart breaking as he leant down to pick up Belphegor's phone, finding that it was still working. He sighed as he slipped it into his pocket, hoping he would get a chance to return it; it didn't feel right keeping the other's belonging.

"Why would you say those things, Gokudera…?" Frowning at his friend, Takeshi's usually-soft eyes hardened. "You hardly even _know_ him."

Shaking his head, Takeshi walked away from the group, intending on returning home.

_**~~XX~~**_

Laying back on his bed a few hours later, Takeshi frowned as he pulled Belphegor's phone out of his pocket. Knowing he shouldn't snoop through someone else's phone but also knowing he would immediately stop it he found anything personal on it, he went into the device and brought up the text messages. There were only conversations from two people saved into it, one from Squalo and the other from Lussuria; Belphegor really _didn't _have friends, did he?

Not wanting to look at the inbox from Squalo in case he came across something he shouldn't know about, Takeshi instead opened the one from Lussuria. He looked at the latest conversation, seeing that the other man really seemed to love Belphegor.

_-Missing you lots, sweetheart- _was the first thing the Namimori student read. -_How's Japan~?-_

Takeshi could almost _read _the monotony in his friend's reply. _-Fine-_

_-Love you, darling. Have fun and make some new friends, okay?- _

Belphegor hadn't replied to this, and upon scrolling further up, it became clear that the blond was rather unsociable to his guardian; if he bothered replying in the first place, it was usually a simple yes or no and then stopped replying altogether.

Looking at more messages, Takeshi stopped as he came across one he had a feeling he shouldn't read; the timestamp on it was several months ago, and though he had no idea what time it had been sent, it seemed that Belphegor wanted to be picked up from somewhere.

_-Come get me- _Hoping he wasn't invading anything private, Takeshi prepared himself to turn the phone off if he indeed was; if Belphegor wanted him to know about something bad, the boy would tell him himself.

_-What's wrong, hon? You haven't been there for long- _

_-I want to come home; I hate this and I hate you for making me go- _Takeshi was surprised by this, having always respected his father too much to tell the man he hated him; just how badly had Belphegor suffered? _-I'm not having any fun anyway; I'm just sitting outside where no one will look for me-_

_-Go back inside and talk to a few people, dear. Go make some friends-_

_-I'm NOT making friends because they fucking hate me! Come get me now before I walk out in front of a car! I TOLD you I should have stayed home and you didn't listen to me! I HATE YOU! COME AND FUCKING GET ME BEFORE I KILL MYSELF!- _

Not wanting to see how the rest of the conversation went, Takeshi closed the messages and instead brought up the other's contact list, upset to see the same two people were the only names listed – in fact, it seemed that Lussuria and Squalo were the only two people to call the blond at all, judging by his call history.

Turning the phone off, Takeshi put it on his bedside table, knowing he needed to return it; it wasn't his property, and he was starting to wish he had never let his curiosity get the better of him; he didn't think he could understand the life his friend was living, not after seeing for himself the way the other treated someone who clearly only loved and wanted the best for him.

Takeshi understood there was something wrong about Belphegor, but he refused to believe the other was all bad; like Gokudera, he was sure there could be a good person beneath all that anger – after all, there was always light in everyone; sometimes people just needed to be taught what their own light was.

_**~~XX~~**_

Dragging himself into the hotel room after nightfall, Belphegor didn't spare a glance for the long-haired man who had been pacing the room with his phone to his ear; he just went straight to the bathroom, kicking the door shut behind him.

"He's just walked in through the door now." Quickly farewelling the police officer he had been making a missing persons report to, Squalo ended the call and made his way over to the bathroom, knowing that something was _very _wrong; he hadn't missed the blood on the younger's clothing, but he knew from experience that it all belonged to him; if it were anyone else's, it wouldn't just be confined to his sleeves. "Bel, what happened? Belphegor, are you – Bel, don't lock the fucking door! Open it now!"

A sob answered the man, and if Squalo wasn't as level-headed as he was, he would have panicked; a locked door and a crying Belphegor meant bad news. Jiggling the knob again, Squalo gave only one warning. "Open the door before I break it down!"

The blond didn't comply, forcing his guardian to kick the door down. Squalo didn't hesitant to kneel next to his charge and pull the younger into a tight hug; something had happened, and if he wasn't careful, Belphegor may do something stupid.

"What happened, Bel?"

"Get off me!" the blond snapped, shoving weakly at the man. "Don't touch me! I fucking hate you! I hate you so much!"

Though these words hurt Squalo greatly, he couldn't let that show; Belphegor needed someone, even if he refused to acknowledge that fact.

"What happened?" Speaking in a soft tone reserved only for the boy, Squalo knew he needed to check on whatever wounds had been inflicted; who knew how deep they were? "Bel? You know you can talk to me about anything. What happened?"

Shaking his head, Belphegor sniffed as he tried to pull away. "I hate you, Squalo! I hate… me… I really hate me… Hate life… Hate everything… I can't… Everyone hates me… I just want to die… Why can't you fucks just let me die…? You shove pills that don't help me down my throat every day, lock me away in straitjackets… And no matter what I do, people still… Still treat me like a freak… There's no point… Just let me fucking _die _already!"

"Why are you suddenly acting like this?" Knowing the boy well enough to know that Belphegor wasn't easily agitated to this point, it made him wonder who he was going to have to kill for hurting the blond; he loved the student with all his heart, and he would do _anything _for the younger – to see him hurting like this… It hurt _him, _too. "Who did what?"

Shaking his head, Belphegor shrugged. "_Everyone _does it, Squalo… You know this… I just… Takeshi makes me confused… I don't… I don't know what… he is to me… I've never had a friend… I don't even… know if I'm allowed to call him one… But Hayato really… Really got under my skin… I don't want to hurt Takeshi, Squalo… I don't want to hurt him, and… that's what confuses me… Hayato just… He was like everyone else… Treated me like a fucking disease… And I could have stabbed Takeshi over it…"

"You're _not _a disease, Bel," Squalo promised. "You're not a freak, either; you just… vent differently to other people. You're always venting; that's why that faggot and I have put up with you for so long. If people can't respect that, then you don't need them in your life, Bel. Just… don't kill them."

Squalo wasn't always sure what to do with Belphegor; it was hard looking after such a broken person, one raised into a life of murder and rape, abused daily by his own family – it really was no surprise he had ended up murdering the ones who had tortured him, nor that he was stuck in the same vicious cycle Lussuria had tried to rescue him from, knowing no one else would want a kid as destroyed as Belphegor.

While it was true Belphegor had never found someone he_ didn't _want to hurt, Squalo didn't know how this would play out; would that change if the blond got bored? What if he lost himself in his head and attacked them? Belphegor was unstable, unable to be trusted _not _to hurt whoever he was in the same room with, but at the same time, he really _did _need a friend, someone he could talk to and have fun with, who could teach him that not everything was solved with bloodshed.

"Takeshi must have been very kind to you if you don't want to hurt him," Squalo observed. He smiled slightly when the other nodded, finally starting to lean in against him, accepting of the embrace.

"He is… It's his friends I don't like…" Belphegor sighed. "Why is he doing this to me, Squalo…? Why do I feel so different because of him…? I don't like this feeling…"

"He is important to you," the man explained, able to paint a good picture of the situation. "He's someone you care about enough to not want to lose. That's a good friend right there, Bel. Don't let his friends fuck it up for you; ignore them and focus on Takeshi; he's the only one who matters."

Belphegor nodded, knowing this made sense – but were they really _friends? _He had the basic understanding of what a friend _was, _but he couldn't truly grasp the entire concept; was he even someone who _could _be _friends _with someone else? He was so _hated…! _

"Go and see him tomorrow and tell him that his friends are upsetting you," Squalo explained. "If he's worth the hassle, he'll fix it. Let me see your wrists; you should know better than to do this shit to yourself – even _I _don't do it."

"No, but you want to sometimes…" Speaking in a tired tone now, Belphegor stopped caring; he let Squalo do as he pleased, putting up no resistance as the man cleaned and bandaged his wounds; his mind was focused entirely Takeshi.

If this was how it felt to want to be friends with someone, he wasn't sure if he could do it.


	6. Chapter 6

**There is gore within this chapter, nothing too graphic, but if it's too much for anyone, PM me and I can summarise it for you. **

The next morning found Belphegor lying back on his bed in the hotel room, his laptop resting against him. Squalo wasn't in the room, having already left to attend another meeting, and according to the man's busy schedule, he wouldn't be back until after dinner.

Deciding he would watch just a few more episodes of a TV series on his laptop before he had a shower and got dressed, Belphegor tugged the blankets tighter around him, snuggling into their warmth as he giggled softly at the episode; he was content for the moment, but he wasn't sure if that would last when he went to see Takeshi; the Japanese teenager made him feel so conflicted, he truly didn't know what to expect.

Rolling further onto his side, Belphegor paused the media player so that he could check the Facebook message that had just been sent to him. He hated Facebook and the only reason it was open right now was because he knew his adoptive parent would jump the gun if he couldn't get into contact with the blond - the boy would never have even _owned _an account if Lussuria hadn't made one for him in hopes he would add people to it and socialise a little.

Of course, that had been nothing but wishful thinking and the only two people who Belphegor had ever added on it were Lussuria and Squalo.

Rolling his eyes, Belphegor debated on ignoring the inbox Lussuria had sent him, knowing that the timestamp showing it had been read would be enough to tell the over-protective man that he was still alive. Clicking the chat box, his sharp eyes scanned the message in boredom.

_-Your phone has been turned off for a long time, hon- _Lussuria had typed. -_Is everything okay? Did you forget your charger?-_

_-No- _Believing that to be easy enough to decipher which question he was answering, Belphegor turned his attention back to what he had been watching. He sighed when Lussuria sent him another message, taking a few seconds before he brought the page back up.

_-No to what? Your charger or how things are?-_

_-My charger- _Intending on ignoring any other message sent from that overbearing man who drove Belphegor crazy at times, the boy went to click his Facebook off completely, only to stop when another message popped up from his guardian.

_-Do you know when you'll be coming home? I miss you, love- _

_-No-_

_-Have you made any friends?- _

The thought of telling his guardian what had happened briefly crossed Belphegor's mind. He pondered how the other would react if he knew the situation, but as tempting as it was to find out how Lussuria would take the news, he also didn't want to have to put up with the man gushing as if he just found out his daughter was getting married.

_-I don't know- _Standing up from the bed, Belphegor stretched as he made his way over to the small fridge resting on the other side of the room. He grabbed the carton of chocolate milk from inside it before he returned to the couch, curious as to what his guardian had replied with.

_-What do you mean, hon?-_

_-I mean exactly what I said; I don't know-_

Lussuria knew his charge well enough to know not to push the other into opening up about these kinds of things; a confused Belphegor was a deadly Belphegor, and he didn't want to get the boy worked up when he couldn't be there to calm him down; it could lead to disastrous results otherwise. _–I'm sure you'll figure it out; you're such a smart little boy~ I'm just about to finish work so I'll talk to you soon~ Love you, hon~_

Belphegor didn't bother to reply to these words; he simply closed Facebook off for good, returning to his TV series. He watched three more episodes in gleeful silence before he yawned and turned the laptop off, knowing he needed to get in the shower and sort things out with Takeshi; if he continued to put it off, he knew he would never get around to it.

Pulling his pyjama shirt off from his body, the boy tossed it carelessly behind him as he neared the bathroom door. He kicked his pants off next as he twisted the knob, leaving behind him a trail that Squalo would surely yell at him for if he were here to see it.

Closing the door harder than he had meant to, Belphegor narrowed his eyes as he caught sight of himself in the mirror. He frowned, lifting a hand to ghost over the length of his arm, the tips of his fingers brushing against the bandages Squalo had wrapped around his self-inflicted wounds. Shuddering as he remembered his torn flesh, the teenager instead let his eyes drift over his torso. He rubbed against a large, jagged scar that ran from his hip all the way up to his chest, recalling the pain associated with the old wound; it was one of the ones that stood out in his genius mind, haunting his dreams at night; it had happened back when he had been hospitalised, a 'punishment' for acting out against the staff who sought to drug him into lethargy so that they could take him against his will with minimal resistance.

Letting his eyes slip closed, Belphegor swallowed his emotions, starting to shake as he recalled the agony those 'doctors' had put him through; it had been the only reason Lussuria had been able to get him out of the facility, because despite having been put in there due to a court order, the man had refused to leave his precious boy alone at hands that beat and raped Belphegor daily, treating him as their own guinea pig for sickening 'medical' research.

Trying not to think too much on his past, Belphegor looked away from the mirror, forcing himself over to the shower. He twisted the taps, waiting until the water was scorching before he stepped beneath the steady stream. He hissed as he felt his skin burning beneath the temperature, but he didn't change it; this was the sort of punishment he gave himself for letting himself remember the things he had been through.

Ignoring the way his vision started to dot and fade to black, Belphegor let himself pass out; maybe if he were lucky, he would hit his head on something and die on the way down.

_**~~XX~~**_

After what felt like an eternity, Belphegor had finally dragged himself out of the bathroom and over to his suitcase, dressing himself in a black tank top and jeans. Having never been one to reveal skin, he dug around in his suitcase some more until he found his favourite striped sweater, glad that Squalo had gotten it washed as soon as he could; the baggy article was something he had had for a long time, and its familiarity never failed to comfort him when he was feeling bad.

Hugging his sweater tight, Belphegor let a small smile cross his face as he moved back to his bed. He laid back, looking up at the roof as he thought about how he would approach Takeshi today; should he go and do as Squalo told him and explain that he didn't like the younger's friends? Should he convey the fact that Takeshi confused him and he wasn't sure what they were? He had never felt like this towards someone before; as intelligent as he was, he truly didn't know how to decipher this situation – hell, even how to _deal _with it; he was too used to hating everyone and taking his anger out on the closest person, it was strange for him to actually _care _if someone liked him or not.

"I hate when my tummy hurts like this..." Frowning, Belphegor dipped his hand, rubbing it over his abdomen; he wasn't used to the strange churning feeling, having never felt it until he met Takeshi. It was different from lust, nothing like the consuming hate and anger he lived with; it was... _inexplicable. _Having once read in a textbook about anxiety and its symptoms, Belphegor wondered if that was what he was suffering –but _why _would he be anxious? He didn't have anything to be anxious over! ...Did he...?

With a sigh, Belphegor sat back up, slipping his sweater onto his torso. He had laid back down for a total of seventeen seconds before the door opened and Squalo stormed in, a look of rage on his face.

"Eh, Squa?" Belphegor lifted his gaze to stare at the man, wondering what could have happened to bring the man back here long before he was due home.

Kicking the door shut behind him, Squalo cared nothing for the loud slam that resonated through the floor of the hotel. He glared at Belphegor trying to control his temper so that he wasn't taking it out on the younger; it wasn't the boy's fault, after all. ...Right? "Lost the fucking business deal, you shitty brat."

"Why?" Rubbing at his eyes, Belphegor waited for the answer.

"Because some fuck started rumours about me and management heard them." Throwing himself down onto his own bed, Squalo sneered at nothing in particular, so angry he wanted to break something. "When I find out who did it, they're fucking dead; Xanxus and I needed this fucking deal."

"What kind of rumours?" Belphegor knew that it would be highly unlikely someone else had started rumours as well; they were from Italy, and very few people knew who they were here – why would _anyone _start rumours about someone who wasn't going to be in the country much longer?

"Called me a fucking child rapist and that I was beating kids, among other shit." Unable to convey just how much these accusations hurt him, Squalo could feel himself on the verge of tearing up; there was a lot he could handle, but sometimes when his depression spiked and he became as exhausted as he was now, little things got on top of him and his pride paid the price. "Why would _anyone..._ say that about me...? I'm not fucking like that!"

Belphegor blinked, near emotionless as he raised his hand in the air. He felt nothing but amusement upon seeing the trouble he had caused for the man, not even the slightest remorse in his heart as he saw the way a single tear slid down his guardian's cheek. "I started those rumours, Squa."

"You…" A look of agony crossed Squalo's face as he realised what had just been said, and he couldn't stop the river of tears from streaming down his face as he felt his heart shattering into thousands of little pieces. "You didn't… Belphegor, you… Why would… you…"

"Because I hate you." Shrugging as if it weren't a big deal, Belphegor continued on. "I hate the way you always yell at me and tell me what to do, and I especially hate when you try to force your own ideologies on me – making me feel bad about myself because I want to die is what pisses me off the most."

"So you think… because you're unhappy in your own life…" Squalo clenched his hands by his side, unable to stop his tears from falling harder than they had in _years_, "…that you can go ahead and fuck someone else's life up… All I've ever done is love you, Belphegor… I am the only other person besides Lussuria who has _ever _treated you well… Who looked after you when we got the court to pull their sentence? We nursed you back to health after what those _fucks _did to you… We've given you everything we've ever had… Treated you as Lussuria's own… And yet, none of that was ever good enough for you…"

Belphegor nodded, speaking in a careless tone. "That pretty much sums things up. Don't forget how I was never appreciative when you two would buy me expensive gifts."

Squalo couldn't stop himself from punching the boy as hard as he could in the face. He wasn't satisfied by the sickening crunch that filled the air, instead grabbing hold of frail shoulders so that he could force his charge down ono the bed. "Voi! Fuck you, you little prick! If you hate us all that much, I should kick you out on your fucking ass and leave you here!"

Belphegor snarled as he pulled a knife from his pocket, slashing Squalo across the chest. "Wait until I tell Lussu how you've been beating and raping me behind his back! You know he'll believe _me_, even without proof!"

Squalo recoiled at the pain that flared in his chest, but it didn't stop him from coming back for more; snatching blond locks into his hand, the man ripped the younger's head to the side as he sent a powerful punch to Belphegor's stomach. He didn't stop as the other was winded; instead, he elbowed his charge as hard as he could in the face.

Belphegor raised his knife, impaling it as deep as he could into his attacker's wrist. He sneered as the other cried out loudly, and it didn't stop him from dragging the knife to the side, oceans of blood pouring forth as he set to work cutting Squalo's hand off. The older male was strong, and the blond knew the only chance he had was to incapacitate the man, so with a stab to the stomach, he waited until the other had weakened significantly before he continued on with his task, drinking in the agonised shouts and cries like music to his ears.

With insane laughter once he had completed his mission, Belphegor next covered the blade in the man's fingerprints before he turned it on himself, leaving a large puddle of blood on the bed and floor as he stabbed himself repeatedly, wanting to pin the blame on Squalo; with a record such as his, he would have to gain every bit of favour with the jury as he possibly could.

Once the boy was satisfied with the wounds he had given himself, he limped towards the door, trying his hardest to keep his laughter to himself as he soon fled the hotel room, putting on the best mask of fear he could manage; he had to make everything look legitimate, after all.

_**~~XX~~**_

Laying back on his bed with his puppy beside him, Takeshi looked up at the roof, wondering if he was going to see Belphegor again; he had grown so used to the other hanging around, it didn't feel right to have the boy staying away like this.

"I hope he doesn't hate me, Jiro…" Scratching the puppy between the ears, Takeshi rolled onto his side so that he could see his pet better. "I didn't want Gokudera to treat him like that, but – Bel? Bel!"

Takeshi had turned at the sound of his bedroom door opening, expecting for his father to want to talk to him – what he would never have guessed was to find Belphegor collapsing on the floor of his room, blood seemingly covering every inch of him as the older male panted and gasped desperately for breath.

Jumping off his bed, Takeshi moved to kneel beside his friend, feeling as if he could cry in horror; what had happened to the blond, and was he going to be okay? Judging by the amount of blood that clung to him, the trail he had left behind, and the paleness of his body, the Japanese teenager didn't think he would be.

"Bel, I'm going to call an ambulance for you." Running back to his bed to grab his phone, Takeshi wondered where his father was; if the man had been out the front by the time Belphegor got here, there was no doubt in the teenager's mind that Tsuyoshi would have been tending to him within seconds. "Try and breathe, Bel. Where's your asthma pump? It might help you."

Finding that Belphegor seemed too far gone to be able to talk, Takeshi knew he was scared; he had never been in this situation before, and he _never _wanted to see someone he cared about in this state.

"It's going to be okay, Bel; I promise."

Belphegor could only lay and pant, having used the last of his strength to get himself here; as genius as he was, he had misjudged what he would get away with wound-wise, and now he wasn't sure if he was going to make it to see the outcome of his actions; it had been a long time since he had felt this weak, many years since he had been so badly wounded.

For so many years, death had been something Belphegor would have welcomed with open arms, but when he had started to realise he had made a miscalculation, the thought of not seeing Takeshi again had panicked him. He had forced himself through horrified crowds, picking himself back up when he had collapsed on the streets, bearing the pain that was too much for even him, all because there was something about Takeshi that made him afraid to die.

Listening to the teenager beg for an ambulance over the phone, feeling the way the younger caressed his head as Takeshi tried his hardest to soothe him… Despite the situation, Belphegor laid there in peace, twitching continuously as he focused on the taller male.

Just what _was _Takeshi doing to him?


	7. Chapter 7

Letting his eyes slip open after what felt like an eternity later, Belphegor growled to himself as he became conscious of the feeling of someone holding his hand. Trying his hardest to tug it back to his own person, the blond quickly became agitated when whoever had hold of him only tightened their grip; did they not understand he didn't want to be touched?

But then, the more he focused on it, the more the boy became aware of the fact that the hand around his wasn't big enough to be Lussuria's, and he sincerely doubted that Squalo would be here with him; the only other possibility was...

"Ta...keshi..." Turning his head to the side, Belphegor grunted as he noticed a tube disappearing up into his nose. Reaching up, he tried to tug at it, only to have his hand pulled away in a gentle manner.

"Don't play with it, Bel; I think it's important."

Grunting again, Belphegor let himself fall limp, too tired to be able to do much else. "..."

"What happened?" The sadness in the younger male's tone was clear now, and the blond couldn't help but let his eyes drift to the side to look at the other; as suspected, Takeshi looked as if he had been crying earlier. "I didn't... I..."

Talking felt as if it were taking too much out of him, and Belphegor would have much preferred to stay silent, but for reasons he didn't entirely understand, it made his chest swirl uncomfortably to see the teenager upset because of him; he wasn't sure if he would ever come to understand the things the other made him feel, but he was beginning to acknowledge that they weren't entirely unwelcome.

Taking a deep breath, Belphegor almost choked at the pain in his lungs. "...S-squalo... a-attacked me... Tried... to kill me... Fought him off..."

Takeshi sniffed at these words, and it was what he said next that made Belphegor feel as if he could throw up for a reason entirely different from nausea. "I-I'm sorry; it's my fault because I didn't try hard enough to help you, Bel. I'm sorry..."

Hearing these words was enough to send the blond into a stunned silence, and it almost made him want to reveal that he had done nothing but make up lies in order to observe the chaos he could cause. Instead, he tried to roll onto his side, only to moan loudly as his body throbbed in agony.

"Don't try to move," Takeshi said. "You're really hurt; the paramedics said you were lucky to have survived."

Belphegor stared in stunned silence, having not expected to have had this result; he had anticipated many things, but to have someone worrying over him like this... It was different to how his own guardian fussed over him, Lussuria being annoyingly over-motherly, but Takeshi...

Takeshi was... perfect.

"How long was I out...?" Raising a hand to lay over his face, the blond fought back the urge to vomit; he _really _must have made some bad miscalculations, because he knew from experience that while he _should _feel a little sick from the blood loss, he shouldn't be so dizzy, he could barely move his eyes without feeling like he were dying.

Belphegor had stabbed himself plenty of times before to know this well.

"A few days." Takeshi reached out, brushing blond bangs out of his friend's eyes. He smiled at the purple orbs that blinked at him, Belphegor trying to adjust to the sudden brightness. "Your guardian came all the way out from Italy to see you. Lussuria."

Groaning in annoyance, Belphegor tried to pull the blankets over his body. "I don't want to deal with him..."

"Why not?" The younger truly didn't understand Belphegor's relationship with his guardian; he had seen for himself from those text messages that the man sincerely loved his charge, and all the blond seemed to do was push the other away and treat him like a disease. "He's really nice."

"He's annoying. He dotes on me too much. I hate it. I hate _him_."

"He was crying when he got here..." Takeshi had sincerely felt sorry for the man who looked as if Belphegor had died, and he wished his friend could see how much he was loved; he had only had to talk to Lussuria a few times to know that the man had a huge heart and cared greatly for the boy he had adopted. "He loves you."

"And I hate him..." Groaning even louder when the door to his room opened, Belphegor wished he could pretend to be asleep again, but it was no use; Lussuria had already found that he was awake.

"Bel-chan!" Lussuria rushed forward, taking his charge into his arms. Hot tears slid down from beneath his glasses as he sobbed, chanting his charge's name over and over again. "Honey, I'm so sorry I left you with him; I had no _idea...!_"

Trying to shove the other off him, Belphegor growled again. "Don't touch me, Lussu."

A look of understanding crossed the other's face as he nodded, pulling away instantly. "I'm sorry, hon. Why didn't you ever tell me he was... doing _that...? _You know I would have put a stop to it right away."

Belphegor shrugged, feeling the stress of the whole ordeal finally catching up to him; pushing himself onto his side, the blond threw up at Lussuria's feet, unable to hold it back any longer. He could feel Takeshi's hand on his shoulder, and though he welcomed that touch, he sneered as his guardian moved closer to him again. "Get away from me, Lussu."

Lussuria was clearly heartbroken by everything that had happened, but he didn't push at his charge; he instead backed away again to sit down on the chair against the wall, hoping the younger would come around soon; it truly broke his heart every time Belphegor acted like this, but he had to remind himself that the boy had suffered in ways he would _never _understand.

"Where's Squalo...?" Wiping at his mouth, Belphegor let himself fall back onto the bed. He sighed as he looked up at the roof, hardly even conscious of nuzzling into the Japanese teenager's hand as it caressed his cheek.

"He's somewhere in the hospital as well," Lussuria explained quietly, a hint of anger in his voice. "He... What happened, Bel-chan? Why is he missing his hand..?"

"I cut it off." Belphegor didn't care for the twin looks of horror surrounding him; he instead continued on, the sincerest he had been about Squalo since he had started the rumours. "He was beating me, and I had had enough of it. I cut his handoff so he would never hurt me again."

"Bel-chan..." Lussuria sat back, shaking his head. It was Takeshi who spoke next.

"You must have been more afraid of him than I had realised..." Looking at his lap, Takeshi sighed. "...I'm sorry; I should have listened to my father when he said to tell the police what was happening... Instead, I left you to deal with it yourself because I didn't know if you would want that..."

"It's not your fault, sweetheart," Lussuria promised, addressing the youngest. "Bel-chan should have known he could tell me; it's not your fault, and I wouldn't expect someone as young and inexperienced as you to know how to handle a situation like this."

"Are the police involved now...?" Fighting back another wave of nausea, Belphegor groaned; he knew that, as much as he didn't want it, there would be cops putting their noses all over the place now – if he slipped up in the slightest, it could ruin everything.

"Yeah, they've been waiting for you to wake up."

Belphegor hummed in response, letting his eyes slip closed again. "I'm really tired..."

"Of course you are, honey." Moving to stand by his charge's side, Lussuria leant down and kissed the blond's forehead. "It's been a huge ordeal for you. Try and get some more rest; I'm going to go and have a cup of tea somewhere quiet. I'll be back later."

"I'll stay with you, Bel." Takeshi reached out, taking his friend's hand in his again. He couldn't help but smile when he felt thin digits curl around his hand, knowing that his friend needed all the comfort he could get after this; he could only hope that once he convinced Tsuna and Hayato to come to the hospital to see the blond, they also would understand that all Belphegor needed was a friend.

_**~~XX~~**_

It was that night when Takeshi opted to stay with his friend did he realise that it was solely his presence that was comforting the older male; Belphegor had refused to let go of his hand, and if he moved away from the bed, the blond seemed to panic and whimper his name, even whilst in a deep, morphine-induced slumber.

Takeshi didn't mind sitting on the edge of the bed, letting his hand be held as tight as a child's favourite toy; all that mattered was that his friend was getting some rest.

"Take...shi..."

Looking down at the older male, Takeshi reached out, stroking the boy's head. "It's okay, Bel. It's okay."

A soft sniff filled the air, hinting at the blond's distressing dreams. "N-no... Stop..."

It was when Takeshi noticed the tears that were rolling down the boy's face did he wonder what the other could be dreaming about; was he reliving his time with Squalo? Or something else? "Bel, it's alright. It's just a dream."

Belphegor didn't quiet down until the younger leant forward, pressing his soft lips to a sweaty forehead. His sniffling stopped as he inched closer to the warmth beside him, his tears starting to cease. He mumbled something incomprehensible before falling silent, his dreams peaceful once more, no longer reliving the childhood he wished he never had.

Takeshi wasn't one for staying up all night pondering things, but he found himself awake until morning, trying to understand what Belphegor had been put through; there had to be more to it that he wasn't aware of, right? More than just Squalo and the things his friend had hinted at.

There had to be more to _Belphegor _than he could see, and after what had happened, Takeshi knew he needed to get Tsuna and Hayato to come around; Belphegor needed friends, having been through too much to continue going through life pushing everyone else away.

Belphegor needed more than just Takeshi; he needed love he actually _welcomed._

_**~~XX~~**_

Having gone to school that day, Takeshi found his two friends seated in their classroom already, a quiet conversation between them.

"Yo~" Sitting down next to the two smaller teenagers, Takeshi smiled his usual smile.

"Hey, Yamamoto." Tsuna smiled back, a bit worried for his friend; he had been told what had happened, and he was truly worried by the dark bags beneath the other's eyes; had Takeshi been sleeping, or had what had happened impacted on his mental health? "Feeling okay?"

"Of course, Tsuna." Running his hand through his dark locks, Takeshi cocked his head to the side slightly, his smile never faltering. "I'm fine."

"How's Bel doing...?" As much as the brunet didn't trust the foreign teenager, it wasn't in his nature to disregard what had happened; Belphegor had almost _died, _and no matter what, he wasn't going to ignore that.

Takeshi nodded again, a slight frown crossing his face at the mention of his friend. He was just about to reply when Hayato cut him off, the silver-haired male saying, "I hope he dies, that fuckin' freak."

"Gokudera-kun!" Tsuna scolded, wishing his friend wasn't so hateful; he knew that Hayato didn't like Belphegor, but this was crossing the line – how could _anyone _wish death upon someone else, especially someone who almost _had _died? "Gokudera-kun, Bel is human, too! He has his faults, but I'm sure he has good points about him, too!"

"Then why don't _you_ ever treat him like he does...?" Takeshi was hurt by his best friend's words, not understanding why Tsuna was being so hypocritical in this moment; if that was how the smallest of the trio felt about Belphegor, why didn't he act like it? Why did he always treat the blond like a disease that could _never _redeem itself?

Tsuna opened his mouth to reply, only to shut it again, lowering his gaze; Takeshi was right, and he hadn't even realised what he was doing until now. "..."

"You should come to the hospital to see him," Takeshi suggested. "He's been really tired, but he's a little calmer from the morphine. He's getting grumpy, but he's otherwise alright."

While Hayato made an agitated sound, it was Tsuna who offered a small smile. "Well... I-I would, Yamamoto, but... He's your friend, and he doesn't really like us very much..."

"That's only because he doesn't know you," Takeshi promised, having a feeling that was the case; the blond was very distant from people, and it seemed logical that, after everything he had been through, Belphegor simply took a while to warm up to others – of _course _he was going to act out around people he didn't feel comfortable with. "Please, Tsuna; I really want him to have some more friends; he needs them."

Sighing softly to himself, Tsuna glanced over to Hayato, already knowing the silver-haired male's answer; if he agreed to this, it would most likely just be him and Takeshi as their own untrusting comrade wouldn't go unless he felt he would be doing some sort of service to the brunet. "I'll go and see him, but only for a little while, Yamamoto; I don't really feel comfortable around him."

Takeshi nodded, knowing it was fair enough; Belphegor seemed to _want _to make the people around him uncomfortable, trying to get them to keep their distance – he must have had plenty of practise doing so as it never seemed to fail from what he had observed.

_**~~XX~~**_

When Takeshi and Tsuna stepped into the hospital room after school, they found Belphegor sitting up on the bed, staring out of the window next to him. He seemed to be mumbling to himself as there was no one else in the room and he hadn't shown any sign of noticing his visitors; was he really in that bad a state? Was it from the morphine, or was he lonely?

"Hey, Bel." Takeshi moved closer to the bed, noticing the way the other flinched at his voice. He was silent as Belphegor turned around to look at him, the older male frowning deeply. "What'cha looking at outside?"

Belphegor cocked his head to the side, seemingly noticing Tsuna's presence, even if he hadn't looked directly at the brunet. "How come he's here...?"

"I asked him to come; I think you could be good friends with him." Takeshi reached out, ghosting his fingers against a small Band-Aid on his friend's cheek. He smiled when warm flesh was pressed harder against his touch, the other nuzzling against him.

"I don't like him, though; I hate him and Hayato." Letting out a loud sigh, Belphegor pulled away. "I want to watch the storm..."

It was then Tsuna moved closer, wary; he knew how volatile the boy before him was, but it seemed Takeshi was right; Belphegor was seemingly placid at the moment, probably too tired to really put up fights. "Do you like storms, Bel...?"

Belphegor tensed at the younger's voice, hesitating to look at the brunet. He stared at the smallest teenager for a few seconds before he muttered, "Yes..."

"How come?" Tsuna was genuinely curious about this, knowing everyone liked something different about storms; what was the blond's reasoning?

"..." Blinking beneath his long bangs, Belphegor mumbled, "They represent me."

"What do you mean?" Tsuna couldn't help but be drawn into these words; what on Earth could the other be implying?

"..." Licking his lips, Belphegor wasn't entirely sure of why he was even talking to the brunet, but he couldn't help but convey himself in this moment; it was strange to open up to others like this, but... For some reason, it didn't feel so bad with Takeshi by his side. "My feelings. My thoughts. Storms are like the conflict inside of me. My emotions, always raging... I get lost inside of them, like the gales that people struggle to withstand at times. My hatred... My anger... It's consuming, like the squalls things get blown away in. The thunder is like the crashing thoughts within my head that either bear down on me without warning, or start gradually but without escape, no matter how far I try to hide in my head. My thoughts are so loud, it's deafening, like the thunder that rocks your homes and leave you wondering if you're going to get out of it alive. And the lightning..."

Reaching up, the boy rubbed his eyes, his voice taking on a much softer tone now. "...The lightning is me in an entirety; the way I can hurt someone in a split second without even seeing it coming, whether it be with words or my hands. It's like how I can change my emotions in a flash for no reason; from docile to angry to pleasured. It's the way the things inside of me can hurt people, cause devastation so fast, even _I _don't see it coming, like a lightning strike starting a bushfire. No matter what I do, I can't control any of this. I can put up as much shelter from myself as possible, but it's no good; like a storm, I still cause panic, hate and despair. Sometimes it's like a war against myself I just have no chance of winning – sometimes, I just don't_ want _to win, though."

"Bel..." Tsuna was breathless, having never heard someone express themselves like this before, and though he knew he should be frightened of the person Belphegor was, the clear depression in the boy's voice was what made him want to cry; he couldn't understand what it was like to feel this way, and it was then he realised; Takeshi was right when he said the other needed friends – _someone _had to help him out of this storm he had so aptly described himself as. "Bel, I..."

Lifting a hand that dragged countless IVs with it, Belphegor pointed out of the window, an emotionless look on his face. "That is me out there. Are you going to treat me as a devastating storm now that you know what I'm like? Or can you look past that and see me for the human I am? I hate people; I need no friends so I care nothing for how you see me. It's how you _treat _me that will decide my intentions towards you."

Tsuna dropped his head, not knowing how to answer this; could he look past the way the blond was and come to understand why he was like this? Or would this information only push him away? He was a meek person – loyal to the end, but meek no less – would he be able to deal with someone like Belphegor?

"...I..." Falling silent, Tsuna knew he had no answer – not yet, anyway. "...I don't know..."

Belphegor didn't bother replying to this; he simply continued staring out of the window, his mouth flat as conflicting thoughts ran through his head, so useless yet so consuming.

The room was silent for several minutes until the door opened and Lussuria stepped in, smiling at the youngest two as he closed the door behind him. Looking at Tsuna, he said, "You're a new face around here; I'm so happy my precious Bel has been making friends; he's never had any until he came up here."

Tsuna smiled shyly, not sure how to explain that they weren't friends and he was honestly _afraid _of the blond. "Bel's really... _unique_."

"He really is." Lussuria chuckled as he moved to sit on the chair by the bed, noticing that Belphegor was so enthralled by his thoughts, he hadn't seemed to notice anything happening around him. "He's always so cranky, but he can be a real sweetheart when he wants to be." Not wanting to admit that his charge would only do so when he wanted something and then would go back to his hateful ways, Lussuria forced the smile to stay on his face, wanting to only love his charge, no matter what. "Poor dear has been through so much; it's only natural he's so grumpy, though."

"Bel hasn't said much," Takeshi said, taking the blond's hand in his. "He's hinted, but he's really guarded when it comes to talking about himself."

"He's like that with me, too." Lussuria sighed, wishing his charge would just allow him to hug him for once; he knew how much embraces could help, but Belphegor truly hated being anywhere _near _him, much less touching. "I adopted him when he was eight. He had... come from a truly abhorrent family. He had been raped and beaten daily by his parents, bullied by his own twin, and had seen so many people dying around him, it desensitised him completely. That's why I adopted him, because when I saw him, I... I could see how _destroyed _he was... No one else would have taken him, and I couldn't leave him to such a cruel system... But because of how he had been raised, he had... Well, he had dealt with his family in the only way he knew, and when a court decided he was predisposed to such behaviour, they had him institutionalised."

Takeshi and Tsuna looked at each other at these words, both remembering the way Hayato had told Belphegor before that he needed to be hospitalised – was _this _why the blond had reacted so badly to it?

"I think I could have saved Bel, could have pieced him back together, but..." Shaking his head, Lussuria fought back tears. "It was the institution that _really _broke him... They were no different to his family, leaving him with mental and physical scars... I found out after a year of him being in there; when I went to visit him, I found he had been so heavily drugged, he was sluggish and confused. I saw all the cuts and bruises on him, found that he had been raped only hours before. The medication they shouldn't even have had _access _to had been forced down his throat daily, and it really messed his body up; that's how he developed asthma, and has a lot of damage to some of his organs. When I got him out of there, I... I knew I had lost all hope of saving him..."

Tsuna made up for the tears Lussuria was holding back; he allowed them to stream down his face as he tried to comprehend the damage that had been done to the blond; this was...

In that moment, Tsuna understood; Belphegor was indeed not all there, but it wasn't his fault – it would _never_ be his fault, and the way he had treated the blond as if it _were_...

Moving over to the bed, Tsuna reached out, brushing his fingers against Belphegor's arm. He wasn't surprised when the other shivered before pulling away, braving the glare he could feel burning right through him. Whispering, "I'm sorry...", the smallest male couldn't help but let more tears roll down his cheeks.

Belphegor was silent for several seconds before he shook his head, shrugging. "Don't pity me; I _hate _it."

Tsuna nodded, knowing he couldn't fault the other for that; Belphegor wanted to be okay in the only way he knew how; by relying on himself and no other.

"What's going to happen now?" Takeshi asked Lussuria, wishing he could help, but _how _did he help? Was there _anything _he could do at all...?

"The police spoke to Bel earlier; they're still putting their investigation together, but I don't know what's going to happen; I've never been in this situation before." Sighing, Lussuria had never felt as hopeless as he did now; all he had ever tried to do was love and care for Belphegor, but it seemed as if nothing he did was good enough for the younger. "I never... thought this would happen..."

Takeshi frowned, unable to understand how hard this must be for Lussuria; if it were hard on _him, _it could only be crushing for Lussuria.


	8. Chapter 8

Several days into Belphegor's hospitalisation, Lussuria finally broke the news he hadn't wanted to tell his charge. Sitting down on the edge of the bed, the man took a thin hand in his, a sad smile on his face as the blond growled at him and tried to pull his hand away.

"I have to go back to Italy." Reaching out, the older male threaded his fingers through dirty golden locks, wishing he could hug the boy. "When Xanxus heard what happened, he broke up with Squalo and fired him. I've got his position now, and you know how it is; very demanding."

Belphegor shrugged, looking over to Takeshi who was on his other side. He opened his mouth to say something, but Lussuria spoke again.

"Have you got your phone, honey?"

Turning back to his guardian, Belphegor shook his head. "I broke it."

"I'll go and buy you a new one before I leave; I want to know that you're doing okay, and what's going to happen with court." Getting to his feet, the man leant down in order to kiss the boy's temple in farewell. "I love you lots, sweetheart~"

Takeshi, who had come to learn that Lussuria really _did _love the blond like his own child, couldn't help but frown when his friend simply ignored the adult; no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't understand how the boy could push Lussuria away like this. "Bel… Maybe you should say bye to him, at least."

"I'm really used to it, hon," Lussuria promised, feeling his mood lift a little at Takeshi's consideration; he never got it from Belphegor, after all. "That's just how Bel-chan is. Would you come for a walk with me, please? I want to get to know Bel-chan's new friend better~"

"Sure." Takeshi smiled before he looked down at Belphegor, putting his hand on the other's skinny side. "I'll be back soon, Bel. Try and get some sleep."

Belphegor hummed in response before he rolled onto his side, careful not to agitate his injuries, and closed his eyes. He had a feeling that Lussuria was going to try and warn the teenager about him, but he found that he just didn't have the energy to care; he just wanted to sleep and never wake up again.

_**~~XX~~**_

While Lussuria truly _did _want to get to know Takeshi, he also knew that, if the two teenagers were to continue hanging around each other, the youngest needed to be taught how to handle Belphegor; he didn't know how much Takeshi had seen, but the odds were, not much – Belphegor was a genius, and he had learnt to mimic normal behaviour through observation; if he wanted to, he would know how to hide his twisted side and come off as a normal boy to Takeshi, which seemed to be the case already.

"Hon, I hate to ask this of you, but would you give my dear Bel-chan a home until all of this is over and done with?" Lussuria glanced down at the younger, glad to see the other's smile hadn't faltered in the least; he might have a chance of finding Belphegor somewhere safe to stay until he was able to return to Italy once everything was over and dealt with.

"Yeah, of course." Takeshi laughed softly, his eyes shining with joy. "Bel's been coming over quite a bit; I think he feels comfortable with me."

"I'm really glad. But you know that with Bel-chan, you need to be careful around him, alright?" Lussuria _hated _the look of confusion on the teenager's face, feeling as if he were just about to break the other's heart. "Bel-chan is really very sick. I don't know if you have noticed it or not, but he can be very difficult and even _dangerous_."

"He's told me he's tried to kill himself, and that he gets angry…" A thoughtful hum left Takeshi's throat as he grabbed his chin, thinking intently. "He doesn't like my friends, and he's hit Gokudera before, but I only felt as if he was trying to look after himself, not that he was dangerous."

"As much as I hate to admit it, Bel-chan is very good at hiding who he really is, and he knows how to fool people if there's something he wants." Glad to see Takeshi didn't look like he were about to run away screaming, Lussuria continued on. "It's not to say you're going to get hurt, but I just want you to be _careful _around him, alright? As I said, Bel-chan is very sick, and if you try and handle him the wrong way, he might turn on you."

"What do you mean?"

"Bel-chan… hurts himselfa lot. He gets so caught up in physical pain that he seeks more of it out, but if you try and stop him from hurting himself, he might not even realise who you are and attack you – simply because you've gotten in the way. There are sedatives in his suitcase I've packed, and if he doesn't seem to hear you when you tell him to stop, that's the only way you're going to calm him down."

Takeshi nodded, taking this on board; what he was hearing was that if he weren't careful, Belphegor could hurt both of them without full awareness of what he was doing. "What happens if I give him too much sedative?"

Offering a sad smile, Lussuria shook his head. "You can't, honey; he's been sedated so much, we have to give him a full syringe now. More importantly, if he attacks you, whatever you do, don't fight him back."

"But then wouldn't _I_ get hurt?" Takeshi was confused by all of this new information; couldn't he just keep doing what he had been with Belphegor?

"Yes, but if he knows someone is reciprocating, he will only lose himself further. If you can't sedate him, you need to keep asking him to stop. It might take a while for him to recognise your voice, but if you are calm and patient with him, he will eventually stop." Sighing, Lussuria mentally prepared himself for the most important piece of advice that could save Takeshi's life - he just hoped it wouldn't scare the youngest away or make him treat Belphegor any differently, or else his own heart would shatter at the knowledge he had been the one to drive away Belphegor's friend. "Bel-chan... carries knives everywhere... And he will use them without hesitation."

Takeshi stopped walking at this, his mouth dropping open in shock; sweet Belphegor... Knives...? What...?

"I don't want to tell you this, but I am left without a choice..." Feeling tears well up in his eyes, Lussuria truly hoped he was doing the right thing; he was only trying to look out for both of the teenagers, but if they were doing fine already, would he only be adding unnecessary detail that could push the Japanese teenager away? "...Bel-chan is... a killer... No matter what I've done with him, I can't get him to stop... I've tried my hardest, but it's all he knows... He will kill anyone he sees as getting in his way, or whom he knows is an easy target he can get away with... Whatever you do, you cannot let your guard down around him..."

Takeshi stared blankly ahead, not knowing how he felt about this information; never before had he thought he would be getting close to a murderer, but here he was... Having just agreed to take care of one...

"Please, _please_ understand that Bel-chan truly knows no better," Lussuria whispered, a few tears sliding down his cheeks. "It's his way of venting, of feeling in control... I just... I can't save him from himself any longer... He's out of my control now... I can't stop this, no matter how much I want to... No matter how hard I try..."

Takeshi drank in these words, knowing that Lussuria was telling the truth; he could see how much the man loved Belphegor, and there was only sincerity in the older male ever since they had met. It wasn't _Lussuria's _fault Belphegor was like this, and Takeshi wasn't going to blame him for something he truly _was _trying to fix – he just wasn't that kind of person.

Ducking his head, the teenager nodded. "Okay, then."

"Please don't think badly of my dear Bel-chan; it's not his fault he's turned out like this..."

"I know." Takeshi moved to look into Lussuria's sunglasses at this, a smile smaller than usual, yet nonetheless genuine, crossing his face. "I've gotten to know Bel well enough to feel safe around him; I don't think he's going to hurt me because we're friends, Lussuria. He's told me he's never had friends before, but he has one now, and I don't think he wants to lose that. Besides; you've already told us a little bit about him, and I understood then and there that he was made this way - what kind of person would I be if I judged him for something out of his control like that? My friend, Gokudera... He's had a bad life, too, and he's a lot like Bel is, but I know that there's still some good in them both; it might just take a while to find it and show them that it _does_ exist."

Lussuria could have hugged the teenager then and there; no one else had ever been so accepting of his charge before, Belphegor's schoolmates treating him like a disease, a plague that would have them suffering slow and painfully before they finally died - maybe they were right in a sense, but if Belphegor had truly wanted them dead, he would have massacred the entire school by now.

Lussuria knew his kid well enough to know that, deep down, Belphegor was still waiting for his classmates to come around and give him a chance, the lost boy who wanted to know what being accepted felt like. Belphegor may have harmed plenty of the other students, but never enough to kill them; in his own little way, he was trying to fit in with the only manner he knew - to hurt others.

If Belphegor had ever wondered why he was so different, the outcast that he was, Lussuria didn't know the details; all he knew was that Belphegor was a boy who didn't care what people thought of him, he just wanted to experience what he observed so often but never received himself.

"It doesn't scare you, knowing the truth about him?" Sliding a finger beneath his glasses, Lussuria rubbed at his eye.

Humming for a few seconds, Takeshi cocked his head to the side. "It does... A bit... But he's been through a lot and he's my friend, and my friends come before even baseball - I look after my friends, and I help them, no matter what; I just need to find a way to get Bel out of his dark place and then I'm sure we can help him. I don't give up on my friends."

Lussuria smiled, glad that Belphegor had finally found what he had been looking for all this time. He wasn't sure if Belphegor could see it or not, but he was so lucky to have gotten a friend like this for his first ever.

Hopefully Belphegor would come around soon and let himself be helped; he needed to be saved as soon as possible.

_**~~Several weeks later~~**_

"Are you sure you're okay, Bel?" Sitting down on his bed, Takeshi watched as his friend slowly entered the room, still a little drowsy from such strong painkillers he had been prescribed for his injuries.

Belphegor hummed as he staggered over to join the younger on the bed, letting himself collapse onto the soft mattress so that he could snuggle in against the teenager's lap. "M'fine…"

Takeshi chuckled, surprised by the effect painkillers had on his friend; Belphegor became much like a kitten when he was drugged, and seemed much more open to others instead of keeping things hidden – in fact, it seemed that when he was like this, he had no filter whatsoever.

Making small talk before Takeshi knew he would have to make a start on his homework, the teenager threaded his fingers through soft golden locks before he said in a soft tone, "So, it's court tomorrow, huh…? Think you're going to be okay?"

"Don't wanna go…" Burying his face in against a strong stomach, Belphegor allowed the scent that was the younger to fill his nostrils, finding it more soothing than anything he had ever found before. "Too much hassle…"

"I know, but you have to go," Takeshi said gently, caressing a pale cheek. "You need justice for what happened."

"Squalo didn't do anything; I was the one who did it all…" Sighing, Belphegor wished Squalo had just died like he had been aiming for, instead of police sticking their noses where it wasn't warranted – he had had the perfect demise for the man, and people had to fuck it up by calling authorities.

"What do you mean?" Gesturing to the body still covered in stitches and bandages, Takeshi frowned. "He almost _killed _you, Bel."

"No, he didn't." Rolling onto his back to look up at the younger, Belphegor yawned, wanting to get this over and done with quickly so he could sleep. "I made up all that stuff about Squa~ The company he was trying to get the deal with must have heard what I made up and refused it, so when I told him it was my fault, he got mad at me. I was the one who tried to kill _him_, and I did all this to myself."

"Bel…" Takeshi had never told his friend that Lussuria had explained everything, and he didn't want to – not just yet anyway; if Belphegor were to know that his secrets had been spilt, he could withdraw from the help the younger was trying to give him.

But _this…_

"Bel, you need to fix this." Takeshi felt horrible about having judged a man he really knew nothing about without asking for Squalo's side of the story, and to have encouraged this whole thing… "Squalo doesn't deserve this if nothing you told me is true."

"Fix it later…" Letting his eyes slip closed, Belphegor's fingers tightened their grip on Takeshi's pants, letting oblivion wash over him. "So tired…"

Takeshi knew he may as well let his friend get the rest he so desperately needed, but could they fix this so soon before court? It made him want to cry, feeling as if he had had a part in everything that had happened – if he had… just…

If he had been a better friend, he would have spoken to Squalo first and then gone from there.

Knowing he couldn't stay mad at Belphegor, Takeshi continued to stroke through golden locks, hoping the situation could be reversed; Squalo _must _have been the nice person the teenager had taken him for upon their first meeting, because despite knowing what Belphegor was like, Squalo had stayed by his side for all this time.

Yes, Belphegor needed to be saved _now_ before it truly became too late.

_**~~XX~~**_

It was when Belphegor woke up just a few hours later did he find Takeshi lying behind him, the younger hugging the blond tight to his body. The boy shifted uncomfortably, his movements waking Takeshi.

Stretching as he yawned, Takeshi then smiled down at Belphegor as he moved closer to the smaller body in his arms. "Hey, Bel. I was having this really nice dream."

Belphegor lay where he was, making no attempt to either move closer or further away from the stronger male; he had grown to trust Takeshi in times like this, but he still wasn't sure if he wanted to return the affections the other always gave him.

Staring at the wall opposite him, Belphegor mumbled, "About what?"

Reaching up to scratch as his cheek as a shy smile crossed his face, Takeshi chuckled lightly, not sure if he should admit the contents of his dream to the older male when he knew it was likely the boy would be mad at him; he had seen enough of society to know there was a high chance of him becoming an outcast if people were to find out he had dreamt of kissing another male. "…"

"Spit it out." Continuing to lay with his back to the younger, Belphegor's breath hitched and he instinctively tried to pull away, uneasy with the palm that had come out of nowhere to lie on his cheek.

"It's just…" Looking to the side, Takeshi sighed. "Have you ever kissed someone before, Bel?"

"No. I've never wanted to." Belphegor was easily able to piece together the puzzle from that question alone, but he couldn't be so sure as to whether or not it had been him in the dream; it could have been Tsuna, Hayato or even some random chick they went to school with for all he knew – Takeshi _did _seem like the type to be uncertain about romantics and was probably only just discovering his true feelings towards someone.

It _couldn't _have been him in the dream because Belphegor knew there was just something about him that made people want nothing to do with him – of _course _the only action he ever had and would continue to get was through raping other people.

No one would ever want him, not even the most desperate person on the face of the Earth.

Takeshi could sense the other falling into a depressive mood, so he continued on, hoping to distract the older male. "What do you think about two guys kissing?"

Shrugging, Belphegor didn't hesitate to speak. "It does not disgust me if that is what you are asking. I have never thought about where I stand on these matters; I have never really wondered about my own sexuality. I don't feel things for people; I can only get hard when other factors are included. I don't really even have wet dreams or masturbate very much; only if I was bleeding beforehand."

Takeshi didn't quite understand what the blond was saying, but he didn't push; he could work out enough to realise that, though Belphegor seemed to have difficulties regarding this whole thing, there was a chance he might not be mad if Takeshi were to reveal that, for a little while now, he had wanted to kiss the other.

The Japanese male wasn't really sure what had brought those feelings on, and he _knew _he shouldn't have them for a killer like Belphegor, but he couldn't help it; the more he got to know Belphegor and the closer they became, the more his thoughts became preoccupied around the broken boy and he felt things he had never felt for anyone before.

"Well…" Feeling his cheeks redden slightly, Takeshi's smile became shyer. "Would you be mad if… I told you that, in my dream, I… was… kissing you…?"

Belphegor took a few moments to process these words, instinctively believing them to be lies - he had been asked out several times at his school, only to be made fun of and told it was a dare and that he was stupid for agreeing when he would never have someone to love him, not even Lussuria or Squalo.

But... Takeshi was so different... Belphegor could lower his carefully-built defences around Takeshi and not get hurt.

Could the younger be trusted for something like this...?

"Why would I be mad?" Deciding to keep his worries to himself for now, Belphegor forced himself to remain calm; if Takeshi was planning on hurting him and saw an opening, that's when the younger would strike.

"Because most people do not seem to like two guys in love..." The genuine sadness in Takeshi's tone was enough to tell Belphegor that the younger had probably always known he liked males but had been pushed away by society before he could truly accept it.

But why would someone want to be with Belphegor...? From an early age, the blond had discovered that he was fated to be alone for his life, so why...?

"Can I kiss you?"

Belphegor blinked at the question, wondering briefly if he were still asleep and dreaming; with all the hurt he had suffered, never before had someone asked to kiss him. He could remember times where he had sat silently amongst his classmates as they played kissing games, never able to understand why everyone got kisses but him, and if he tried to kiss them on his turn, he would only get shouted at and put down.

Belphegor was curious about kissing, having seen Xanxus and Squalo do it often enough to come to understand that there was more to it than what he was seeing on the streets and on TV; Squalo and Xanxus had a near-abusive relationship, so if they were kissing each other...

"Why do you want to kiss me...?" Despite having just woken up from sleep, Belphegor couldn't keep the exhaustion from his voice; he wasn't sure if he would be able to handle more pain like this in his life, not from Takeshi.

"Well..." Takeshi's face reddened to that of a tomato, but he continued to explain his reasoning. "I guess I... really like you, Bel. I-I understand if you don't like me back, but... I really do like you..."

Belphegor couldn't bring himself to believe these words, having heard enough variations meant only to cause him pain; if Takeshi was telling the truth, the younger was going to have to prove it. "Show me."

Takeshi chuckled nervously, having not expected for this reaction, but he couldn't turn it down; not when he had to show his friend that someone loved him.

Taking a deep breath of anxiety, Takeshi pressed his lips against Belphegor's pale cheek for several seconds.

Belphegor felt nothing like Lussuria had told him he would feel when he finally kissed someone. He didn't know if it were his guardian or the younger lying to him, but he wasn't happy; Takeshi hadn't proved anything except that kissing only seemed to make Belphegor miserable. "I don't believe you."

Takeshi understood; he was dealing with a broken boy, after all. "I don't know if kissing your lips is crossing any boundaries, so..." Rubbing the back of his head in a sheepish manner, Takeshi tried to grin in order to diffuse the situation.

"It's sex I don't want," Belphegor mumbled. "Not like this, anyway... That's my one and only boundary; don't force me to get hard when I just can't; you won't like how it turns out..."

Takeshi nodded, agreeing without hesitation; he wasn't sure if he wanted anything more than just kissing yet, so without further ado, the teenager leant close again, pressing his lips against pale ones.

While Takeshi was in awe at these feelings, Belphegor just felt numb as usual; he laid there, letting the younger do as he pleased without responding in the slightest; he was still uncertain about how he felt, and he was sure he would need time to figure things out.

Takeshi, amidst his inexperienced kisses, reached up, caressing a soft cheek in a tender manner; he had never felt so happy before, not even after scoring all of his home runs; this was... pure bliss, and he wasn't sure if he would feel the same if he were to kiss someone else - Belphegor was special.

Licking at the older male's lips, Takeshi was relieved when the other allowed him entrance. He tasted all over, admiring the flavour of candy that was Belphegor. He tried to get the other to kiss him back, but if anything, the smaller tongue only retreated from him.

Takeshi couldn't be upset; not when he knew it must have taken a lot for Belphegor to trust him like this in the first place.

Breaking apart for air, Takeshi ignored the thin string of saliva that still connected them, staring down with a loving expression in his eyes. "Do you want to be my boyfriend, Bel? I promise we won't move fast; I like just kissing you."

Fighting back the tears Belphegor was barely aware of creating, the blond leant up, wrapping one arm around the younger's torso as he pressed his ear to Takeshi's chest, listening to the heartbeat; it was rather fast, proving the other's excitement and nervousness, and Belphegor found himself wishing he could stay like this forever; that heartbeat was one of the most comforting things he had ever heard, and in this situation, it soothed him to know that Takeshi was truly different to everyone else.

"If you were to get involved with me, you would only get hurt..." Belphegor muttered. "You would run away and never come back if you knew who I truly am. I don't want to hurt you... The only person I don't want to hurt..."

"Lussuria already told me everything," Takeshi promised. "If I didn't run away then, I certainly wouldn't now. I love you, Bel."

Looking to the side, Belphegor swallowed thickly; he wanted to accept and find out for himself what a relationship was like, but he knew Takeshi would only get hurt; he would eventually want sex with the younger, and trying to imagine the blood wouldn't be enough to keep him interested during intercourse; he would need his knives, to physically cut and bleed his lover, just like what he did to his rape victims - but never would he rape Takeshi; Takeshi was someone he wanted to keep forever, to protect and kill for.

Would that be possible if they were to become boyfriends?

"You'll get hurt..." Belphegor whispered again, a feeble attempt at warning the other. "I... will need to hurt you when we have sex... I won't be able to orgasm if I can't..."

"We can worry about that when we get there," Takeshi promised before leaning down, kissing the smaller boy again. "I love you, Bel."

Belphegor just looked away, his fingers curling into the teenager's blue jacket as if to anchor himself to Takeshi. He nodded once, knowing the stronger male would understand, and the next thing he knew, he was being embraced by his very first boyfriend.

If this was a dream, Belphegor didn't want to wake up any time soon.


End file.
